So yeah, I threw a TON of shade at our
Frigid Ape friends last week (but maybe not as much as I did at Meg White - but she deserves it. She knows what she did.) So if you had not guessed it already, this week we will focus on Alex Turner and some other guys. Yes, you might say that we have come crawling back to them. I even contemplated telephoning them after I was imbibing.
Yes, I only made that call while I was somewhat elevated.
It is rumored that these
Wintry Orangutans may have established a taco-exporting lunar base (it actually had a high local Yelp rating, or so I’ve heard). Yes, these
Chilled Hominids are our focus. They have 7 Brit Awards and 6 studio albums. (Side note:
Robbie Williams has 18 Brit Awards so I’m pretty sure you can buy them at the airport kiosk.) They also, according to reliable sources, appear handsome on surfaces upon which you rhythmically gyrate.
They are this week’s
featured artist. About Them One of the defining characteristics of JHo and the Boys can also be found with this group of
Frosty Baboons: They never make the same record twice. Consequently, they are tough to define. They are a mash-up of influences and styles and each new album veers off in wildly different directions. Are you dressed up in a jean jacket with lots of buttons? You’ll love their sometimes Indie vibe. Just smoked a bowl? Yep, they have that desert groove. Feel like a night out with the lads? Their earlier, more up-tempo stuff is for you. Thinking more Billy Joel/Elton John? Yes, they have piano-based music. Want hip-hop?
Screw you, I did the
Run the Jewels post already. Go back there.
These
Bitter Mandrils hail from Sheffield, England. The band was formed in 2002 between a group of close friends. They initially had Andy Nicholson on bass, but after a series of conflicts on a North American tour, he got the boot. His replacement was
Yellam’o Salochin - or as he’s better known, Nicholas O’Malley. The other core members of the band are Jamie Cook on guitar, Matt Helders on drums, and the one and only Alex Turner on just about everything (but most typically the microphone).
Although initially lacking in confidence, Turner would soon be pushed to the front of the band for his way with words. The reason for this would eventually become clear, as Turner revealed in 2013 that all band members
are actually Alex Turner. Lets not deal with that
Game of Thrones-esque plot twist yet though.
Stylistically, these guys are about as British as they come. You know how when people from England sing, they almost always sound like they have no accent? Turner is the exception. No, I don’t mean that he’s like
John Lydon from The Sex Pistols, because part of that band’s rebellion was to sound quintessentially British instead of like manufactured pop. And no, I don’t mean that he is like
Liam Gallagher from Oasis, because let’s face it, that guy barely sings anyway.
In his early work, Turner decided to double-down on his roots and perform his songs with his regional dialect. You can literally hear the Sheffield twang in his music, and the band would exemplify this British charm in all the tracks leading up to their first album.
After much practice, and several gigs, the band recorded some demos and began handing them out for free at their concerts. This eighteen song collection, dubbed
Beneath the Boardwalk, would garner them a fair bit of fame, and was soon popping up on various file sharing and social media websites. That’s right. The number one lesson you need to take away from this is: if you want to get famous,
MySpace is the way (even though they didn't even make their own page).
Soon they released an EP named
Five Minutes with Arctic Monkeys on their own label. The success of this led to them playing the Reading and Leeds festival, where they drew an unusually large crowd for such an “unknown” band. In 2005 they signed with Domino Records, and released their debut single
I Bet You Look Good on the Dancefloor to great success, reaching No. 1 on the UK singles chart.
By September of the same year, the band’s first album,
Whatever People Say I am, That’s What I’m Not was done. Upon release, it became the fastest selling debut album in UK history, with over 360,000 copies sold in the first week.
This album was (and still is) the epitome of British indie punk, and is pretty much the national anthem of North England night clubbers. No, not that kind of
clubbers - clearly, I mean something more like
this. After this album, and a few singles / short EPs,
“Who The Fuck Are Arctic Monkeys?” was the question on everyone’s mind.
This was answered in the release of their
follow up album,
Favourite Worst Nightmare (2007), which also hit No. 1 on the charts shortly after release. Much like it’s predecessor, it drips with Sheffield character, but in a slightly different manner. The song writing on this record gives a range between blistering speed and raw emotion. Tracks like
Do Me a Favour and
505 demonstrate prowess and dexterity in Turner’s writing, and hinted at darker, more serious tones for the band’s future.
This came to fruition on what some may view as the band’s most important record:
Humbug (2009). Our boy Josh took the young lads under his wing, producing and co-writing
this album in the one and only Rancho de la Luna. When you listen to it, it shows. This record is dark, moody, and full of beautifully weird metaphors and winding riffs. There is still a good amount of energy in this album, seen in tracks like
Pretty Visitors, but the dark moody undertones of the desert are strongly on display in songs like
The Jeweller’s Hands and
My Propeller. All in all, this album was one that saw an amazing level of evolution in the band’s song writing (and I swear, all that Josh touches turns to
gold.)
Oh and this album also soared to No.1 on release. Go figure.
A few years later, they released the album
Suck It and See (2011), a record that was
a pure ray of sunshine compared to Humbug. The album features a considerably lighter sound, not that it lacks that signature Turner flair, but the tracks generally lean towards a slightly more accessible sound. All in all, it’s still a great album, and an important step in their musical development. Also, please expect to see somebody write a 4 page essay on why
Brick By Brick is the best song they have ever written over on their subreddit by next week.
Oh and it also reached No.1 on release. Noticing a trend maybe?
Anyway, these
Glacial Lemurs then released that
squiggles album in 2013. It became
marginally popular. Something something also reached No. 1, something something popular in America, something something Alex Turner’s greaser haircut was SO cool and I want it back. It is also worth noting that our boy Ginger Elvis made a cameo on this record (so I mean, it’s gotta be cool).
Moving on, their most recent album saw Turner embark on a Taco-Powered mission to the Moon.
Tranquility Base Hotel & Casino (2018) was originally going to be released as a Turner solo album. However, upon hearing it, his band mates decided to join in and make it into a fully fledged
Numb Chimpanzees record. Moon-Tacos can be persuasive.
This album is chock full of alluring and idiosyncratic lyrics that conjure up wonderfully unique aesthetics. It has a laid back, piano-centric melancholy feel that is found nowhere else in their discography. It is so different from their previous albums that many have mixed views on it, but in my opinion, it’s the ultimate grower - I only started enjoying it on maybe the 5th listen. Overall I give it a solid 80% (unheard of, I know!)
Oh and of course, it also hit No. 1.
And notice how I never returned to that
Game of Thrones Plot twist? Yep, just like the final season. No, I am not bitter...why do you ask?
That puts a neat bow on their discography, give or take their numerous B-Sides, which are a whole other rabbit hole. I have also neglected some other important Alex Turner records, such as Submarine (his only solo album) and both albums by The Last Shadow Puppets, which are also important stylistic stepping stones for the band. This also explains why Alex Turner’s shoulders are so strong, since he has to carry Miles Kane’s career on both of these records.
All in all, Turner is also a lot like our very own
Baby Duck in that he has done multiple projects with multiple artists above and beyond his core band. A self-described “control freak” and reluctant frontman - yet he seems possessed by a desire to constantly explore, create and collaborate on new music.
There’s nothing quite like these Arctic Monkeys, even if their name is really easy to mess up.
Links to QOTSA Queens of the Stone Age and our featured
Polar Simians first met at a rather disappointing gig in
Houston in 2007. Josh described them as a
”down-to-earth, earnest group of people that grew up together and somehow made a bubble to protect themselves from the explosion that is their band.” He also remarked that,
”They’ve been playing this most dangerous game of changing every record and reaching like a rock climber for the next grip.” It is clear that Josh saw his own musical journey reflected in the band, so much so that Homme co-produced and co-wrote their 2009 third studio album,
Humbug. That album was recorded in large part out at Rancho de la Luna. Queens have even done a
cover version of
Why’d You Only Call Me When You’re High? Alex Turner did guest vocals on
If I Had a Tail. Josh reciprocated by doing guest vocals on
Knee Socks. During the recording of
AM, Turner said of Josh:
”He came down and sort of got us out of a little rut. It’s just fun, it’s friends, extended family now...His contribution to our record is really exciting, it’s probably my favourite.” Josh has stated about Turner that
”he has a special gift for the gab” and that Matt Helders is
”one of the best drummers in rock ‘n’ roll.” Helders joined Josh, Dean Fertita and Iggy Pop to record
Post Pop Depression at Rancho de la Luna in 2015.
Their Music Fluorescent Adolescent R U Mine? Brick by Brick 505 Why’d You Only Call Me When You’re High? Knee Socks Pretty Visitors I Bet You Look Good On The Dancefloor Mardy Bum Four Out Of Five Show Them Some Love /arcticmonkeys Previous Posts Tool Alice in Chains King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard Rage Against the Machine Soundgarden Run the Jewels Royal Blood Below is a rundown of letters J-L of Epstein's contacts. Last year, I wrote about letters A-C. You can check that out here (
https://www.reddit.com/conspiracy/comments/cpis3n/a_brief_rundown_of_the_first_ten_pages_of_jeffrey/).
I also wrote about letters D-F on July 5, 2020. You can check that out here (
https://www.reddit.com/conspiracy/comments/hlrba8/a_notsobrief_rundown_of_letters_df_in_jeffrey/).
I posted letters G-I on July 13, 2020. You can check that out here (
https://www.reddit.com/conspiracy/comments/hqko0y/a_notsobrief_rundown_of_letters_gi_in_jeffrey/). There are some misspelled names. Epstein entered their names like this.
I have bolded some of the more interesting connections and information, but there could be much more that I overlooked. I hope something here strikes an interest in someone and maybe we can get more investigations out of this. Please, if you know anything more about any of these people than what is presented here, post below. I am working off of the unredacted black book found here:
https://www.coreysdigs.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/07/Jeffrey-Epsteins-Little-Black-Book-unredacted.pdf J-L Jackson, Michael (Samuel Gen): Yes, this is a reference to MJ the singer. However, the numbers listed are not MJ’s. They belong to Samuel Gen, a lawyer for a financial advisor (Jerry Seinfeld’s brother-in-law) who worked for MJ for a while. This one was a reach for Epstein.
Jacobson, Julian: Likely a reference to a Managing Director at several London-based investment firms.
Jagger, Mick: World-famous lead singer of the Rolling Stones. Has been seen in photographs with Ghislaine Maxwell. Actress Rae Dawn Chong claims she slept with Jagger when she was 15 years old.
Jagger, Hatti: Former fashion director for Vogue, Harper’s, and Tatler. Also works as a celebrity stylist and at fashion shows.
jake: Not enough info.
Jameel, Mohammed: Saudi Arabian businessman. CEO of Abdul Latif Jameel, a collective of family-owned businesses that specialize in transportation, investing, and real estate. Royal pervert Prince Andrew infamously partied on Jameel’s yacht during the 2011 London riots (source: https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/prince-andrew-frolicks-on-yacht-with-mystery-147496). James, Susie: Founder and owner of 123 Send Ltd, a company that provides payment terminals.
Janklow, Linda: Literary agent and wife of Mort Janklow, the primary owner of Janklow & Nesbit Associates, the largest literary agency in the world. Attended a party hosted by Sony Pictures with Epstein, although they are not pictured together (source: https://www.patrickmcmullan.com/search/?event=5b3ef4fb9f92906676446c21). In 2007, Ghislaine Maxwell threw an exclusive party (80 carefully selected guests) at her NYC townhouse to celebrate the opening of a new shop by designer Allegra Hicks (granddaughter-in-law of Earl Mountbatten, who you can read more about in my G-I Epstein thread under India Hicks’s name). One of the eighty guests was Julie Landlow, daughter of Linda and Mort. Jarecki, Nancy & Andrew: Andrew is a filmmaker, co-founder of Moviefone, and was a producer on Catfish, the documentary that launched the popular MTV show. Andrew’s family was reportedly friends with Jeffrey Epstein. There is an EXCELLENT thread on the connections between the Jarecki family (especially Andrew and Nick’s father, Henry) and Epstein here (source: https://threadreaderapp.com/thread/1200044576947556352.html). Quick summary: Henry was born in Nazi Germany; flew on the Lolita Express; is an expert in psychotropic drugs; owns two islands in the British Virgin Islands; founded the first youth center in the British Virgin Islands; lived 2 miles from Epstein in NYC; owns and donates to many sketchy foundations, schools, and organizations; has donated at least $1 million to leftist organizations). Andrew’s wife Nancy created bettybeauty, a company that specializes in hair dye for your nether regions (not kidding). Jarecki, Nick: The movie director brother of Andrew and son of Henry Jarecki (see link under Andrew & Nancy Jarecki for more info). Reportedly dated Courtney Love (also in Epstein’s ‘Black Book’) in 2015. Photographed with Ghislaine Maxwell at a Gucci party (source: https://www.gettyimages.com/detail/news-photo/ghislaine-maxwell-and-nick-jarecki-attend-gucci-hosts-a-news-photo/591605562). Jason (canada): Not enough info. Could be artist Jason Wasserman based out of Canada. The second number listed traces back to Station 16 Gallery in Montreal.
Javier: Javier Banon is former Co-head of Merchant Banking at Lehman Brothers and current Founding Partner of Trilantic Europe.
Jeffries, Tim: Ownedirector of Hamiltons Gallery in London. Best known for dating models Elle Macpherson, Claudia Schiffer, Kylie Minogue and Sophie Dahl (also in Epstein’s ‘Black Book’). Jefferies has attended fundraisers for ARK Academy and the NSPCC. He truly cares about children. Johnson, Richard & Nadine: Nadine is a millionaire public relations guru. Nadine is a good friend of Ghislaine Maxwell’s. Some clients of Nadine Johnson include spirit cooking extraordinaire Marina Abramovic and hotelier Andre Balazs, good friend of Ghislaine. Richard is one of the most well-known gossip columnists and was the editor of Page Six for twenty-five years. There is a great thread detailing the Johnsons’ ties to the Clintons, Balazs, and others here (source: https://threader.app/thread/1162148078981394432). Basically, Richard Johnson is friendly with the Clintons and, as Page Six Editor, purposely did not report or downplayed stories on the Clintons and Nadine’s clients. He also took bribes. Considering Nadine is a good friend of Ghislaine, it would not be a stretch to assume that Richard could have buried stories on Maxwell and Epstein. I could spend 10 pages on the shady connections these two have. Johnson, Lucy: Not enough info.
Jones, Ann & Mick: Mick is the guitarist of Foreigner, an immensely popular rock band in the ‘70s and ‘80s. His wife, Ann, is a jewelry designer, and friend of Ghislaine. Ann Jones was photographed at a party with Ghislaine and Donald Trump in 1997 (source: https://www.the-sun.com/news/85818/epstein-madam-ghislaine-maxwell-milked-billionaire-dad-and-threw-lavish-parties-with-beautiful-women/) Josephson, Barry & Jackie: Barry is a producer and the former President of Production for Columbia Pictures. Jackie is his ex-wife and also a producer.
Karella, Kalliope: Wife of Prince Pierre d’Arenberg. Kalliope is a good friend of Ghislaine Maxwell.
Kastner, Ron: No info found.
Katz, Anton & Robin Plant: Anton is CEO and co-founder of Talos Trading, which specializes in cryptocurrency. Anton and Robin are friends of and have been photographed with Ghislaine (source:
https://www.patrickmcmullan.com/search/?person=5b3ef50c9f929066764df255).
Katzeneilenbogen, Mark: Long-time investment banker who used to be based out of South Africa.
Keeling, Sarah: There is a Sarah Keeling in London who is a former British government official with 20 years of experience in national security and intelligence experience, however, the phone number listed has a 410 area code, which leads back to eastern Maryland. Inconclusive.
Kegan, Rory: A nightclub designer and creator. Co-founder of the exclusive, celebrity-filled London nightclub, Chinawhite. Prince Andrew (source: https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/9818190/prince-andrew-pictures-cast-doubt-epstein-sex-slave/) and Prince Albert of Monaco are regulars. Chelsea Clinton has been there, as well (source: https://www.standard.co.uk/news/bright-night-for-china-white-6299739.html). Other patrons include: Prince Andrew, Kate Middleton, George Clooney, Leonardo DiCaprio, and more. Keidan, Amanda: Owner of Keidan Jewelry.
Keidan, Jon: An entertainment executive-turned-venture capitalist. As an entertainment exec, Keidan worked with John Legend, Dave Matthews Band, and Nappy Roots. Keidan serves on the Council of Foreign Relations, a powerful group that some believe determines foreign policy. Former and current members include former presidents, current and former politicians, business magnates, and celebrities (https://www.cfr.org/membership/roster). Keller, Georgie: Interior designer.
Kellette Frayse, Caroline: Fashion editor at Vogue and Tatler (both magazines constantly come up in Epstein’s contacts). Former girlfriend of Imran Khan, whose name has come up frequently. Passed away in 2014. Her husband, Jean-Marc Fraysse, is a French investment banker.
Kelmenson, Leo-Arthur & Gayl: Leo was an advertising and marketing guru who has been credited with saving Chrysler. Friend and advisor to Lee Iacocca, former President of Chrysler. He worked as Special Project Officer for the U.S. Department of State under President John F. Kennedy and AG Robert F. Kennedy. He had tons of connections. His former maid accused him of sexual harassment in 2010 (source: https://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/maid-harassment-suit-claims-ad-exec-leo-arthur-kelmenson-madman-pervy-mad-men-wannabe-article-1.156915). Kelmenson died less than two months after the story came out. Kennedy Cuomo, Andrew & Kerry: Andrew is the current governor of New York. It’s no secret that Cuomo is willing to look the other way on sexual deviancy as long as he receives a payoff. Cuomo halted a probe into the handling of Harvey Weinstein’s case in New York after receiving $25,000 from Weinstein’s law firm (source: https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/bjbqg4/andrew-cuomo-received-dollar25000-donation-from-harvey-weinsteins-law-firm). Andrew’s brother, CNN Host Chris Cuomo famously told viewers “not to get caught up in the intrigue of who Epstein’s friends are” (source: https://www.realclearpolitics.com/video/2019/07/11/cnn_cuomo_lets_not_get_caught_up_in_the_intrigue_of_who_was_friends_with_jeffrey_epstein.html). Perhaps, he was covering for his brother. Kerry Kennedy is Cuomo’s ex-wife of fifteen years, the daughter of RFK, and a close friend of Ghislaine Maxwell. Supposedly, Kennedy provided Ghislaine with informal illegal advice (source: https://www.splicetoday.com/politics-and-media/the-nth-word-and-m-theory). Kennedy Jr. Ted: Son of Ted Kennedy and nephew of JFK and RFK. Ted Jr. dabbled in politics and currently works as a lawyer. His father, Ted, was a notorious sexual abuser (allegedly). Kennedy, Bobby & Mary: Bobby is the son of RFK and nephew of JFK. Bobby is a known drug abuser and philanderer. Bobby kept a sex journal detailing his conquests while he was married (source: https://nypost.com/2013/09/08/rfk-jr-s-sex-diary-of-adultery/). His ex-wife, Mary, committed “suicide” two years after their divorce. Before committing suicide, Mary told a friend that she “feared for her life” and Bobby told her that she “would be better off dead” (source: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3231043/How-serial-cheater-Bobby-Kennedy-Jr-strutted-family-home-exposing-private-parts-demanded-m-nage-trois-wife-Mary-went-public-Cheryl-Hines-telling-Mary-things-easier-killed-herself.html). Kennedy, Ethel: Widow of RFK Sr. and mother of eleven, including Bobby Kennedy, Kerry Kennedy, and Joseph Kennedy II. Kennedy, Jo: Joseph Kennedy II is the son of RFK Sr. and Ethel. Served in the House of Representatives from 1987-1999. In 1973, Joseph was convicted of negligent driving after paralyzing a young woman. He was fined $100. Kennedy, Senator Edward: Brother of JFK and RFK, Ted Kennedy served as U.S. Senator of Massachusetts for 47 years. Besides politics, Ted is best known for the Chappaquiddick incident in which a young female speechwriter for RFK drowned to death when he lost control of his vehicle while driving across a bridge. He was charged with leaving the scene of an incident and given a two month suspended sentence. Ted was also notorious for his extramarital affairs. Senator Kennedy once hosted a party at his house attended by Bill Clinton and Lynn Forester de Rothschild. Rothschild wrote a letter to Clinton afterwards in which she mentions that they spoke about Epstein (source: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7283825/Jeffrey-Epstein-injured-jail-cell-following-possible-suicide-assault.html). It is unclear what was said or what Rothschild’s connection could possibly be. Kersner, Sol: South African accountant and hotel and casino magnate who died of cancer in 2020. Kerzner was a close friend of Donald Trump. They even worked together to create The Palm, a man-made island off the coast of Dubai (source: https://www.ft.com/content/46393280-d9f9-11da-b7de-0000779e2340). Kerzner was also close friends with Sarah Ferguson, Duchess of York (https://www.gettyimages.com/detail/news-photo/sarah-ferguson-the-duchess-of-york-sol-kerzner-chairman-and-news-photo/83768272), Naomi Campbell (https://www.gettyimages.ca/detail/news-photo/naomi-campbell-and-sol-kerzner-pose-backstage-during-the-news-photo/82869744), and Bill Clinton (https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8144647/As-Sol-Kerzner-dies-aged-84-RICHARD-KAY-looks-riotously-louche-life.html). Kerzner was very good friends with Nelson Mandela and built his casino resorts with Gerard Inzerillo, who you can read about in my G-I ‘Black Book’ thread. Khayat, Antoine, Jana, & George: Jana is an heiress and businesswoman. Jana is the niece of Galen Weston, a close friend of Prince Charles. George is her brother and CEO of Associated British Foods. Jana’s husband, Antoine, is a former banker and currently runs their vineyard. Kidd, Jemma: Kidd is a British makeup artist, fashion model, and aristocrat. Married to Arthur Wellesley, Earl of Mornington, the son of the Duke and Duchess of Wellington, making her a Countess. Kidd is an interesting figure with elite connections. From 2005-2012, Ghislaine Maxwell served as Director of Jemma Kidd Make-Up Limited, a U.K. makeup company, which was founded by Kidd. Not only did Ghislaine serve as Director, but she was also a shareholder, along with the Rothschild family (source: https://nationalpost.com/news/world/in-hiding-for-years-epstein-accomplice-ghislaine-maxwell-spotted-in-l-a-burger-shop). If you click around the PDFs on this website (https://beta.companieshouse.gov.uk/company/05340072/filing-history), you can see everything. The 16 JUN 2006 PDF on page 3 shows you a list of Officers and shareholders of the company. Jemma Kidd has also attended charity events for the National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children (NSPCC) (https://www.alamy.com/stock-photo-beckham-nspcc-party-jemma-kidd-106882170.html). Her sister, Jodie, is also a huge supportefundraiser of the NSPCC, as well as the Help a London Child and Monsoon Accessorize Trust charities, both of which help out disadvantaged children (source: https://www.looktothestars.org/celebrity/jodie-kidd). King, Abby: No info found.
Kirwin Taylor, Charlie & Helen: Charles is an investment banker. He was former CEO of Credit Suisse in Switzerland, an investment firm which shows up a few times through Epstein’s contacts. His wife, Helen, is a journalist.
Kirwin Taylor, Peter: British financier. Was a member of the Pilgrims Society (
https://isgp-studies.com/pilgrims-society-membership-list), a group that has included the Rothschilds, Rockefellers, and other elites amongst its ranks.
Kissinger, Dr. Henry A: Former U.S. Secretary of State and National Security Advisor under Nixon. Kissinger has long been accused of committing war crimes (ex: carpet bombing Cambodia, installing fascist governments in Chile and Argentina, genocide, extending our stay in Vietnam, etc) yet somehow managed to win a Nobel Peace Prize in 1973. Kissinger once said, “Military men are dumb, stupid animals to be used as pawns for foreign policy.” Kissinger served with Epstein on the Trilateral Commission. Kissinger has also been a member of the Bilderberg Group, the Council on Foreign Relations, the Aspen Institute, and Bohemian Grove. Long thought to be an advocate for a globalist New World Order, Kissinger is a scumbag of the highest order. His connections with Gates, the Clintons, Bush Sr. and Jr., the Rockefellers, and the Rothschilds are well-documented. If anyone here has ever done any research regarding the NWO, you have undoubtedly seen Kissinger’s name several times. Klee, Rupert & Charlotte de: Rupert is a Director with Oakridge Group, a property development and investment company. His wife, Charlotte, is the producer of the religious plays at Wintershall.
Klesch, Johnathan: Former Director of Klesch Trading, which specializes in industrial commodities. It has offices in Russia, Malta, Surrey, and in London, down the block from Buckingham Palace.
Koch, David: Co-founder of Koch Industries, a diversified manufacturing conglomerate. Koch Industries has stolen oil from Indian reservations, committed hundreds of polluting, labor, and workplace safety violations. When he ran on the Libertarian ticket as the vice presidential nominee in 1980, Koch aimed to abolish Social Security, Medicare, Medicaid, welfare benefits, and minimum wage. Koch and Epstein were friends. Epstein even attended a party at Koch’s Southampton home (https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7270735/Jeffrey-Epstein-Trumps-closest-advisers-Wilbur-Ross-Rudy-Giuliani-Steve-Mnunchin.html). Koch has also been photographed with Ghislaine Maxwell (https://www.reddit.com/KochWatch/comments/dcjth3/david_koch_ghislaine_maxwell_getty_images/). Thankfully, Koch died last year. Kohl, Astrid: A businesswoman involved in pharmaceuticals. Married to Prince Alexander of Liechtenstein. Daughter-in-law of Prince Philipp of Liechtenstein. Niece of former German Chancellor, Helmut Kohl.
Kotic, Boby: CEO of Activision Blizzard, a video game holding company. Used to run several electronic companies. From 2003-2008, he was a director at Yahoo! In 2012, he became a non-executive director of Coca-Cola.
Kotze, Alex Von: British businessman involved in the tech industry.
Kravetz, Anna: Not much info found. Has a degree in finance from Wharton School and used to live on Park Avenue in NYC.
Krooth, Caryn: A successful real estate agent based out of Los Angeles
Kudrow, Alistar: No info found.
Lal, Dalamal: Director of Akron Corp. & Akron (Nig.) Ltd., a food and beverage import company based out of Nigeria.
Lalaunis, Demetra: Daughter of Ilias Lalaounis, a pioneer in Greek jewelry and a world renowned goldsmith.
Lambert, Christopher: Well-known actor.
Lambert, David: Former partner, managing director, and VP at Goldman Sachs.
Lambert, Edward: Lampert is a billionaire hedge fund manager and former CEO of Sears. Lampert graduated from Yale University in 1984 where he was a member of Skull and Bones. Rumored pedophile David Geffen gave Lampert $200 million to invest in 1992, when Lampert was just 29 years old. Lampert made Geffen $1 billion. Lambos Duff & John: Karen “Duff” Duffy is an actress, model, and TV personality. She has had memorable roles as the love interest in “Blank Check” and as JP Shay in “Dumb and Dumber.” Duffy has battled with sarcoidosis, a deadly central nervous system disease, since the mid-’90s. She credits Harvey Weinstein with saving her life (https://nypost.com/2000/10/03/coping-with-class-this-model-patient-suffers-in-style/). John is a former banker with Morgan Stanley and current President of GCA-US, an investment banking company. Lang, Caroline: An art expert and Chairman at Sotheby’s Switzerland.
Lange, Dieter: Former Partner at WilliamHare, an international law firm with offices in London, Berlin, the U.S., Beijing, and Brussels. Passed away in 2010.
Larsen Janet: The only one I can find is a Business Psychologist based out of London.
Laurie, Jonathan: Founder and CEO of Cheyne Capital Management, an alternate investment fund firm.
Lavlada, Laura D.B. de: Laura Diez Barroso is a Mexican businesswoman. She sold her stock in Televisa for $726 million in 1993. Since then, she has been the head of several other companies.
Lawford Christopher & Jean: Christopher was an actor and relative of the Kennedys. His uncles were JFK, RFK, and Ted Kennedy. Many of his relatives appear in Epstein’s ‘Black Book’. His first wife, Jeannie, was an ad-sales associate for New York Magazine. Lawton Paul: Two British businessmen with the same name come up. Both have extensive resumes. Could be either one.
Lazar, Christopher & Marie: Christophe seems to be a realtor in Paris, but I am not completely sure.
Le Bon, Simon & Jasmine: Simon is the lead singer of Duran Duran. His wife, Yasmin, is/was a fashion model. Yasmin is represented by Models1 in London. Models1 also represents Epstein and Ghislaine’s friend, Naomi Campbell. Le Bon has been accused of sexual assault in the past (https://www.freep.com/story/news/2018/07/12/simon-le-bons-accuser-sex-assault-claim-speaks-out-awful/777106002/). Le Fur, Jean-Yves: French businessman and magazine creator. He was once Princess Stephanie of Monaco’s ex-fiance. More notably, Le Fur was the one who discovered supermodel Karen Mulder (his girlfriend at the time) on the floor after she attempted suciide. Mulder blew the lid off the rampant rape and sexual abuse that she and her modeling colleagues had suffered at the hands of businessmen, royalty, celebrities, and government officials. She was even the protege of Epstein collaborator (allegedly), Jean Luc Brunel (https://www.miamiherald.com/news/local/article238351108.html). Le Marg Willie: No info found.
Lea, Piers: CEO of Learning Technologies Group, a workplace digital learning company.
Leeds, Jeffrey: Co-founder and Managing Partner of Leeds Equity. One of Leeds Equity’s partner companies is Endeavor Schools, which runs private preschools, primary schools, and secondary schools in Florida and 11 other states (https://www.leedsequity.com/news/articles/leeds-equity-partners-completes-investment-in-endeavor-schools). They are also partners with Fusion Educational Group (now Fusion Academy), which runs a chain of private secondary schools (https://www.leedsequity.com/news/articles/leeds-equity-partners-completes-investment-in-fusion-education-group). Former teacher Kris White, now the head of Fusion Academy in Palo Alto, allegedly told a student that he was in love with her and wrote her a note saying he was “obsessed” with her. (https://www.mercurynews.com/2020/07/12/teachers-named-in-presentation-high-sex-investigation-kept-working-as-bay-area-educators-for-years/). This story was just published on July 12, 2020. Hypothetically, if one wanted to procure underage children, it would certainly help if the head of the school was on board and possibly a pedophile himself. According to this former teacher at Fusion Academy, “many students struggle with learning differences, behavioral issues, and/or addictions” (https://www.glassdoor.com/Reviews/Employee-Review-Fusion-Academy-RVW21260629.htm). In other words, the downtrodden and vulnerable. Fusion Academy refers to itself as a non-traditional school that focuses on individual students. Seems like a great opportunity. Leeds was also good friends with Epstein (https://nymag.com/nymetro/news/people/n_7912/) and has close ties to Colin Powell and Rudy Giuliani (https://nypost.com/2016/09/14/colin-powell-wont-vote-for-her-because-of-bill-clinton/). Lefcourt, Jerry: Famous lawyer who defended Epstein in 2007. That same year, Epstein donated $250,000 to the Washington-based Foundation for Criminal Justice, where Lefcourt was a board member.
Lester, Dominick: Founder and owner of MortgageFlex Systems, a mortgage lending company.
Levine, Phillip: Ex-Miami Beach mayor and close friend of Bill and Hillary Clinton. He claims that he doesn’t know how Epstein got his contact information… all 13 phone numbers, including those of his driver and housekeepers (https://www.miaminewtimes.com/news/ex-miami-beach-mayor-philip-levine-listed-13-times-in-jeffrey-epsteins-black-book-11242116)! Liman, Doug: Popular Hollywood director and producer. He directed Swingers, The Bourne Identity, and a couple of Tom Cruise movies.
Lindeman-Barnet, Sloan & Roger: Sloan has been a New York Times bestseller and an on-air and print reporter for NBC, ABC, and Reuters. Sloan and Roger also sit on the board of the Spence School in New York City, a private K-12 all-girls school (https://www.spenceschool.org/2017---news-detail?pk=999120). Her husband, Roger, is the founder of beauty.com and Chairman and CEO of Shaklee, a highly successful nutrition company. Donald Trump, Melania Trump, and Ghislaine Maxwell all attended the publication party for Sloan’s book in 2008 (https://www.gettyimages.com/detail/news-photo/ghislaine-maxwell-anton-katz-and-robin-katz-attend-sloan-news-photo/619921016 ; https://www.gettyimages.co.uk/detail/news-photo/donald-trump-melania-trump-sloan-barnett-and-roger-barnett-news-photo/619921180).Other guests included Steve Mnuchin, Epstein and Maxwell chum Carol Mack, and a bunch of others also featured in Epstein’s ‘Black Book’ (Colin Cowie, Anton and Robin Katz, and Vittorio Assaf). Lindemann, Adam & Elizabeth: Adam is a billionaire investor and art gallery owner. Brother of Sloan (mentioned just above). Elizabeth is his ex-wife. She is often photographed with many other people mentioned in Epstein’s ‘Black Book.’
Lindemann, George(Sr.) & Freida: Now-deceased billionaire father of Sloan and Adam. George was the CEO and Chairman of Southern Union, a pipeline company and served as Vice President of the Metropolitan Opera Association of NYC. His wife, Frayda, is the President and CEO of the Metropolitan Opera.
Lindsay, Alex & Jaclyn: Alex is a war documentary maker who rents out his loft at the address Epstein has listed (
https://www.independent.co.uk/property/house-and-home/property/spheres-of-influence-72014.html).
Lindsey, Ludovic: Racecar driver.
Lindsley, Blake: Actress who was in two movies directed by Doug Liman (also in Epstein’s book) - “Swingers” and “Getting In.”
Linley, David: Princess Margaret’s son, Queen Elizabeth II’s nephew, and first cousin of Prince Charles and Prince Andrew. Linley is a furniture maker and the 2nd Earl of Snowdon. He used to be the Chairman of Christie’s auction house in the UK.
Liogos, Babis: No info found, but one of the numbers traces back to Thylan Associates, a real estate and investment firm.
Lister, Paul: Likely the director of legal services and company secretary for Associated British Foods, or it could be a conservationist. Not sure which.
Livanos, Arriette: I believe this Arietta Livanos, wife of Greek shipping magnate, Stavros Livanos. Arietta passed away in 1986.
Lo Cascio, Robert: Founder and CEO of LivePerson, a tech company that develops conversational commerce. LoCascio was photographed with Ghislaine at an after party in 2012 (
https://www.gettyimages.com/detail/news-photo/ghislaine-maxwell-and-robert-locascio-attend-osklen-spring-news-photo/1169681572).
Loeb, Alex: Alexandra is the daughter of John Loeb, former U.S. Ambassador to Denmark under Reagan and former Delegate to the United Nations. John Loeb was also a special advisor to Nelson Rockefeller. Alexandra is also a descendant of the Lehman family (Lehman Brothers). Alexandra graduated from Spence Day School for Girls (mentioned earlier under Sloan and Roger Lindemann-Barnett). Lonsdale, Richard: British investment banker.
Lorenzoti, Eva Vivre: Founder of luxury online retailer, Vivre.com and is a TV spokesperson/personality. Good friend of Ghislaine Maxwell. Maxwell and a couple of Rockefellers were guests at her house for a dinner party in 2010 (
https://hauteliving.com/2010/11/doris-world-eva-lorenzottis-dinner-party/105102/).
Lorimer, John & Lottie: John works as a private investor and as a realtor. His wife, Lottie, is an interior designer.
Louthan Guy J: Prolific British film producer and former boyfriend of actress Liz Hurley (also in Epstein’s book).
Love, Courtney: Famous drug addict, musician, and actress who likely killed her husband, Kurt Cobain. Courtney famously claimed that Prince Andrew showed up to her house late one night in 2000 looking for sex. She has since retracted this claim. The entries under Love’s name all say ‘Dana’ next to them. This is Courtney’s ex-boyfriend, Dana Giacchetto. Giacchetto was considered to be the “stockbroker to the stars” and was friends with JFK Jr, Leonardo DiCaprio, Johnny Depp, and many others. He ripped his clients off of millions. Even more telling, Giacchetto was involved in a sex abuse case against X-Men director Bryan Singer (https://www.yahoo.com/entertainment/news/leonardo-dicaprios-convicted-ex-money-manager-denies-bryan-050000120.html). He died in 2016 after he partied too hard and overdosed (https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/news/dana-giacchetto-dead-stockbroker-stars-902383). Lowell, Ivana: Guinness heiress who wrote about Harvey Weinstein’s sexual abuse while she worked at Miramax in her book back in 2010 (
https://www.irishcentral.com/culture/entertainment/guinness-heiress-spoke-out-about-predator-harvey-weinstein-7-years-ago). She also dated Harvey’s younger brother, Bob.
Loyd Mark: No info found.
Lucas, Colin: The godfather of Boris Johnson, England’s current Prime Minister. Lucas is a British historian and university administrator. Served as Vice Chancellor of Oxford University from 1997-2004.
1965 Jokers Wild (Dave Gilmour)(320)
1966 Tonite Let's All Make Love in London
1967 Arnold Layne
1967 Relics
1971 Pink Floyd - Relics (Remaster AU 1987 CDAX 701290)
1967 Scream Thy Last Scream
1967 See Emily Play & Scarecrow EP (Remaster UK 2007 Bonus CDM 40th ADEd. 50999 5 03919 2 9)
1967 The Piper At The Gates Of Dawn (UK Stereo First Pressing 24bit-96khz)
1968 A Saucerful of Secrets
1968 Pink Floyd - A Saucerful Of Secrets (Remaster Japan 1988 CP32-5272)
1968 It Would Be So Nice
1968 Point Me at the Sky
1969 OST More (Remaster Japan 1987 CDP 7 46386 2)
1969 Soundtrack From The Film More
1969 Ummagumma
1969 Zabriskie Point e Ultimate Z. P
1969 Ultimate Zabriskie Point [FLAC]
1970 370 Roman Yards 1970 (The Lost Zabriskie Point Album) [MP3]
1970 Pink Floyd - Atom Heart Mother (Remaster US 1994 UDCD 595)
1970 Pink Floyd - Atom Heart Mother (UK LP EMI Harvest SHVL 781 24bit-96khz)
1970 Roger Waters - Music From The Body (Soundtrack)(320)
1970 Syd Barrett - Barrett
1970 Syd Barrett - The Madcap Laughs
1971 Pink Floyd - Meddle (Remaster Japan 1988 UDCD 518)
1971 Meddle - 24-96 Vinyl Rip (FLAC)
1971 One Of These Days Single Vinyl 7 (Italy 1971 EMR-20388)
1972 Pink Floyd - Obscured By Clouds (Remaster US 1987 CDP 7 46385 2)
1973 Money Vinyl 12 (Remaster Netherlands 1981 Vinyl 12 1A K052Z - 78068)
1973 The Dark Side of the Moon - (Vinyl LP 24-96 UK Remaster 30 Harvest SHVL 804 24Bit 96kHz) - 200g Vinyl Rip (FLAC) - Audiophile MFSL Pressing VINYL {FR1 Cartridge SYBORG} - Unreleased Tracks
1975 Wish You Were Here
1975 Pink Floyd - Wish You Were Here (Remaster UK 1984 CDP 7 46035 2) & Unreleased Tracks
1977 Animals- (2016 Master) VINYL {FR1 Mk3 Cart} - (2016 Master) VINYL {Stanton 881 Cart} - (Remaster US 1985 CK 34474) - (Vinyl LP 24-96 US Columbia First Pressing JC 34474 24Bit 96kHz)
1978 David Gilmour - David Gilmour
1978 Rick Wright - Wet Dream
1979 The Wall - (Remaster Germany 2007 2xCD CDS 7 46036 8) - (Remaster US 1989 2xCD UDCD 2-537) - US UltraDisc 2CD- (UK Vinyl 2xLP 24-96 SHDW 411 24Bit 96kHz) - The Wall Work In Progress
1981 Nick Mason's - Fictitious Sports
1983 Not Now John Vinyl 7 (UK 1983 HAR 5224)
1983 The Final Cut (Remaster EU 2007 Oh By The Way Boxset CD14 50999 511267 2 8, 511 2672)
1983 The Final Cut (US 1983 QC 38243)
1984 David Gilmour - About Face
1984 Rick Wright - Zee Identity
1984 Roger Waters - The Pros And Cons Of Hitch Hiking
1986 Roger Waters - When The Wind Blows
1987 A Momentary Lapse Of Reason - [1987] [FLAC] - [2019] Remix
1987 Roger Waters - Radio K.A.O.S. (320)
1992 Roger Waters - Amused To Death
1994 High Hopes & Keep Talking (France 1994 CDM 881 777 2)
1994 Take It Back (Netherlands 1994 CDM 7243 8 81278 2 0)
1994 The Division Bell - (2014) [HD Tracks] 24.96 - (Japan 1994 SRCS 7324) - [UK 1994 Vinyl 24-96 EMD 1055]
1996 Rick Wright - Broken China
2002 Roger Waters - Flickering Flame
2004 Roger Waters - To Kill The Child & Leaving Beirut (Single)(320)
2005 Roger Waters - Ca Ira
2006 David Gilmour - Arnold Layne EP
2006 David Gilmour - On An Island
2006 Smile (1-Track EU Promo CD Single)(320)
2006 Smile (2-Track EU CD Single)(320)
2007 Roger Waters - Hello (I Love You)(Single)(192-320)
2010 The Orb and David Gilmour - Metallic Spheres
2014 The Endless River
1967-03-18 My Uncle Is Sick Because The Highway Is Green
1967-09-13 Starclub, Copenhagen
1967-09-25 BBC Playhouse Theater, London (BBC Sessions)
1967-10-30 Games for May - England
1967-11-13 Ahoy, Rotterdam, NL
1968-02-24 Bouton Rouge
1968-05-06 First European International Pop Festival, Piper Club, Rome
1968-05-23 Paradiso, Amsterdam (Late Show)
1968-07-27 Shrine Exposition Hall, Los Angeles
1968-12-28 Margriethal, Jaarbeurs, Utrecht
1968-12-28 Owed To Syd Barrett
1969-03-27 Saint James Hall, Chesterfield, England
1969-04-14 Royal Festival Hall, London
1969-04-27 Careful With These Tracks
1969-05-09 University Of Southampton, Hampshire, England
1969-06-22 Free Trade Hall, Manchester, England
1969-06-26 Royal Albert Hall, London
1969-08-08 The Journey Through the Past
1969-08-09 The Paradiso, Amsterdam - Celestial Instruments
1969-09-17 Amsterdam '69 (TSP-CD-052) 1990 [VBR]
1969-09-17 Complete Concertgebouw
1969-10-11 Song Days Festival, Essen
1969-10-19 Around the Mystic - London
1969-10-25 Interstellar Zappadrive - Mont de L'Enclus, Amougies, Belgium
1969-11-21 Montreux Switzerland
1969-12-06 Afan Lido Sports Center, Port Talbot, Wales
1969-71 Echoes Of Atom Heart Mother
1969-73 Rare & Live Tracks - 3cds
1970 - 1971 Eclipse (2001)
1970 Fat Old Gigs 4cd
1970 Pepperland In The West
1970-01-18 Fairfield Hall, Croydon, Surrey
1970-01-23 Hotel de Champs-Elysees a Paris, Paris
1970-02-11 Town Hall, Birmingham
1970-02-28 Refectory Hall, Leeds University, Leeds, Yorkshire
1970-03-12 A Trick of the Light
1970-03-13 The Injustice of a Kaleidoscope Sound
1970-03-14 Meistersinger Halle, Nuremberg
1970-03-15 Niedersachsenhalle, Hannover
1970-03-20 Akademiske Foreningens Store Sal, Lund, Sweden
1970-04-11 Gymnasium, SUNY, Stony Brook, NY
1970-04-22 Capitol Theater, Port Chester, NY
1970-04-29 [HRVCDR016] Interstellar Fillmore - San Francisco, CA
1970-04-30 [HRVCDR034] - KQED
1970-05-01 Civic Auditorium, Santa Monica, CA
1970-06-27 Bath Festival Of Blues And Progressive, Shepton Mallet, Bath
1970-06-28 Holland Pop Festival, Kralingen, Rotterdam (JFE remaster)
1970-07-12 Open Air Pop Festival Aachen, Aachen Soerser Stadium
1970-07-16 Focus - Paris Theater, Regent Street, London, England - BBC FM
1970-07-16 Libest Spacement Monitor (TSP-CD-027 1989)
1970-07-16 Mooed Music - BBC Session Live, Paris Cinema, London
1970-07-18 Hyde Park, London
1970-08-08 Les Nuits Musicales, Saint Tropez (Pop 2 TV Show)
1970-09 & 1971-03 - Eclipse - APE
1970-09-12 Parc De Vincennes, Paris
1970-09-16 Pink Is The Pig (Live In London)
1970-09-16 Pink Floyd - Focus 1971 [FM]
1970-09-16 Playhouse Theatre, London
1970-09-16 Rhapsody In Pink (Italy 1990 LLRCD 044)
1970-09-26 Electric Factory, Philadelphia, PA
1970-09-27 Fillmore East, New York City, NY (Early Show)
1970-10-17 Pepperland Auditorium, San Rafael, CA
1970-10-23 Creatures Of The Deep Disc 1-3
1970-10-23 Santa Monica Civic Auditorium, Santa Monica, CA
1970-11-06 Mind Your Throats
1970-11-07 Grote Zaal, De Doelen, Rotterdam
1970-11-11 Conserthuset, Gothenburg
1970-11-12 Falkoner Centret, Fredriksberg, Copenhagen
1970-11-13 Vejlby Risskovhallen, Aarhus
1970-11-14 Ernst-Merck-Halle, Hamburg
1970-11-21 Smokin' Blues (Montreux Casino, Montreux )
1970-11-22 Altes Casino, Montreux - Swiss Made
1970-11-25 Fridrich Ebert Halle, Ebertpark, Ludwigshafen
1970-11-26 Messehallen, Stuttgart
1970-11-29 Circus Krone, Munich
1970-12-22 City Hall, Sheffield
1971 Atom Heart Mother Goes On The Road
1971-02-12 Lecture Theatre, University Of Essex, Colchester
1971-02-13 Students Union Bar, Technical College, Farnborough
1971-02-25 Grosser Saal, Musikhalle, Hamburg
1971-02-26 Stadthalle, Offenbach
1971-04-03 Oude Ahoy, Rotterdam
1971-05-15 Crystal Palace Garden Party, London
1971-05-18 Pathfoot Building Refectory, Stirling University
1971-06-04 Philips Veranstal Tungshalle, Dusseldorf
1971-06-05 Echoes - The Return of the Son of Nothing (West Berlin)
1971-06-05 Sportspallast, Berlin - Mauerspechte
1971-06-05 Vierundzwanzig Teile von Nichts (HRV-CDR-029)
1971-06-12 Palais Des Sports, Lyon
1971-06-19 Palazzo Delle Manifestazioni Artistiche, Brescia
1971-06-20 Palaeur, Rome
1971-06-26 Amstel Free Concert, Amsterdamse Bos, Amsterdam
1971-07-01 Ossiach Festival Stitschoff, Ossiach
1971-08-06 Hakone Aphrodite, Hakone, Japan
1971-08-09 Festival Hall, Osaka
1971-08-13 Festival Hall, Melbourne
1971-09-18 Live in Montreux
1971-09-23 KB Hallen, Copenhagen
1971-09-30 Meddled
1971-09-30 Meddler
1971-09-30 One Of These Days (TSP-CD-034 1989)
1971-09-30 Paris Cinema, London
1971-10-04 HRVCDR010 - Pompeii Rev B
1971-10-04 Live at Pompeii - Remains
1971-10-04 Pompeii (Remaster Netherlands PFP-A0118)
1971-10-04 to 07 In The Shadow Vesuvius - Italia
1971-10-04 Volcanic Destruction
1971-10-07 Live At Pompeii
1971-10-10 Great Hall, Bradford University, Bradford, Yorkshire
1971-10-16 The Eye of Agamotto - Civic Auditorium, Santa Monica
1971-10-17 Convention Hall, Community Concourse, San Diego
1971-10-17 From Oblivion
1971-10-17 Wind And Seabirds - Convention Hall, San Diego
1971-10-27 Auditorium Theatre, Chicago, IL
1971-10-28 Hill Auditorium, Ann Harbor, MI
1971-10-31 Fieldhouse University Of Toledo
1971-11-05 Hunter College - New York City, NY
1971-11-06 Case Western Reserve University, Cleveland, OH
1971-11-10 Labyrinths - Pavillion De La Jeunesse, Quebec
1971-11-12 Irvine Auditorium, State University, Philadelphia, PA
1971-11-16 Something from Nothing
1971-11-16 The Return of the Sons of Nothing
1971-11-20 Embryonic Madness
1971-11-20 One Of Those Days
1971-11-20 Taft Auditorium, Cincinnati, OH
1971-11-20 Taft Auditorium, Cincinnati, OH (2-source blend)
1972-01-20 The Darkside Rehearsals - Brighton Dome, Brighton, England
1972-01-21 The Guildhall, Portsmouth
1972-01-22 Eclipse Of The Dark Side - Winter Gardens, Bournemouth (Recorder 2)
1972-01-22 The Dark Side Winter Gardens - Bournemouth (Recorder 1)
1972-01-23 Gathering On The Moon - The Guildhall, Southampton
1972-01-27 Waiting for The Moon - City Hall, Newcastle-Upon-Tyne
1972-01-28 You Are Number Six - Refectory Hall, Leeds University, Leeds
1972-02-17 - Rainbow Tapes Day 1
1972-02-18 - Rainbow Tapes Day 2
1972-02-19 - Rainbow Tapes Day 3
1972-02-20 - Rainbow Tapes Day 4
1972-02-19 Finsbury Park - Disc 1
1972-02-20 Finsbury Park - Disc 1
1972-02-20 The Best Of Tour 72 (TSP-CD-049 1990) [VBR]
1972-03-06 Acid Moon - Taiikukan, Tokyo, Japan
1972-03-08 Natural Dark In Osaka. Japan
1972-03-09 Echoes From Osaka
1972-03-13 The Dark Side Of The Ice - Saporro, Japan
1972-03-13 The Great Gig On The Moon
1972-04-28 Chicago
1972-05-21 2nd British Rock Meeting - Germersheim, Germany
1972-06-28 Eclipsed By The Dome - Brighton [MP3]
1972-09-22 Hollywood Bowl, Hollywood, CA
1972-09-22 Staying Home To Watch The Rain[VBR]
1972-10-21 The Oxfam Concert - London [MP3]
1972-11-15 Echoes Of The Past, Sporthalle Böblingen, Stuttgart, Germany
1972-11-15 The Great Gig In Böblingen
1972-12-01 Harsh Realities [Stereo Tweaked]
1972-12-09 - In a Neutral Land - Zurich - Suiça (FLAC)
1972-12-12 Across The Swiss Border
1972-73 Nebulosity
1972-73 The Great Gig In The Sky (UK Unofficial SSR 41925)
1973-03-06 The Valley Of The Kings
1973-03-11 Yeeshkul!
1973-03-14 Live Music Hall - Boston, MA
1973-03-15 Dark Soundboard of Philadelphia
1973-03-17 Dark Side of Radio City
1973-05-19 Supine in the Sunshine
1973-06-17 On Stage Saratoga NY
1973-06-20 Breaking Bottles In The Hall
1973-06-20 Merryweather Post Pavillion, Columbia, MD
1973-06-29 When You're In...Tampa
1973-10-13 Set The Controls... - Vienna [MP3]
1973-11-04 Obscured At The Rainbow [VBR]
1974-06-24 Shine On Paris
1974-11-15 Black Holes In The Sky
1974-11-15 Work in Progress
1974-11-16 BBC Archives (HRV CDR 033)
1974-11-16 No Room Upon The Hill
1974-11-16 Time In London
1974-11-16 Wembley MTX-V2
1974-11-16 Wembley Pre FM-Master
1974-11-16 Wembley Wizards
1974-11-17 Getting Better All The Time
1974-11-28 Empire Theatre
1974-12-09 Manchester Day '74
1974-12-14 Stairstep To Abandon - Bristol, England [Vinyl]
1975-04-08 Azimuth Coordinator Pt. 1
1975-04-13 Riding The Cow.Cow Palace,California,USA
1975-04-26 Cruel But Fair
1975-04-26 Dogs And Sheep
1975-04-27 Hogs in Smog
1975-04-27 Los Angeles, CA master
1975-06-15 Faster Jersey
1975-06-15 Jersey Not Mother
1975-06-16 Random Precision
1975-06-18 Boston Garden Matrix Version
1975-06-18 Boston Gardens
1975-06-18 Crazy Diamonds [VBR]
1975-06-18 Echoes In The Gardens
1975-06-22 Heavy Rain
1975-06-28 Master Reel - Ontario (RTR-DAT-Source 2) (flac)
1975-80 - Azimuth Coordinator 1975 a 1980 (6CD box 1998)
1977-01-05 Iron Pigs On Fire - Fort Worth, Texas
1977-01-23 - If Pigs Could Fly
1977-01-23 Bugger's Eyes
1977-01-29 Desk Pig In Berlin
1977-01-30 Absolut Floyd
1977-01-30 Hunting Animals - Berlin, Germany
1977-02-01 Test Flight - Vienna, Austria
1977-02-20 Animals In Belgium - Antwerpen [FLAC]
1977-02-20 Ducks On The Wall
1977-02-20 Thirteen
1977-02-22 Dragged Down By The Stone
1977-02-22 Pavillion de Pigs
1977-02-27 Animals On The Wing
1977-04-22 Hurricane Floyd Hits - Miami FL
1977-05-01 Iron Pigs On Fire
1977-05-09 Animal Instincts
1977-05-09 Mr Pig - Oakland [MP3]
1977-06-19 Chicago '77
1977-06-19 Soldier Field, Chicago, IL (1st gen Charly C.'s tape - source 1)
1977-06-27 Boredom and Pain (Boston Gardens)
1977-06-27 Boston Garden, Boston, MA - The Perfect Day (FLAC)
1977-06-27 Boston Garden, Boston, MA (Lampinski)
1977-06-27 Pink Floyd 1977-06-27
1977-07-01 Live at Madson Square Garden
1977-07-02 In the Grassland Away
1977-07-02 Live at Madson Square Garden
1977-07-02 Prog King - Madison Square Garden
1977-07-02 Welcome To The Machine
1977-07-03 Madson Square Garden - New York
1977-07-03 Pigs Might Fly
1977-07-04 Sheep Independence Day (FLAC)
1977-07-06 Azimuth Coordinator Pt. 2 - Last Animals
1977-07-06 Fire Works Show In The Canadian Walls
1977-07-06 Montreal
1977-07-06 Who Was Trained Not To Spit On The Fan
1980-01-01 The Wall Rehearsals 1980
1980-02-07 Azimuth Coordinator Pt. 3 - flac16
1980-02-08 Little Black Book With My Poems In
1980-02-27 The Wall Live In Nassau
1980-02-28 Nassau - Coliseum - NY
1980-08-09 Soundboard on the Wall - Earls Court, London, England
1980-1981 Is There Anybody Out There The Wall Live
1981-02-19 Tear Down The Wall
1981-02-20 The Sixth German Show-Westfalenhalle, Dortmund
1981-02-20 Westfallenhalle,Dortmund, Germany
1981-06-16 Earl's Court, London (Watching The World Upon The Wall)
1984-04-30 (Gilmour) Live At The Hammersmith Odeon (London )(320)
1984-05-22 (Gilmour) Beacon Theater - New York City-NY
1984-06-16&17 (Waters w. Clapton) Sidewinder (Stockholm)
1984-06-29 (Gilmour) New Game - Berkeley [FLAC]
1984-07-12 (Gilmour and Friends) In Floyd We Trust (320)
1984-07-12 (Gilmour) Westwood One Concert (48kHz)(320)
1984-07-18 (Waters) Eric the Player, Roger the Singer
1985-03-20 (Waters) Live Radio City Music Hall, NYC [FM]
1985-03-28 (Waters) Complete Hitch Hiking Perfomance
1987-09-16 Echoes By The Lake Disc 1-3
1987-09-19 Prism
1987-11-01 Live at the Orange Bowl, Miami
1987-11-07 (Waters) Goodbye Mr. Pink Floyd (Remaster)
1987-11-30 MONEY GOES WEST - (The Sports Arena - Los Angeles, California)
1988 Delicate Sound Of Thunder (UK 7914802)
1988-02-19 Live in Melbourne (SOUNDBOARD)
1988-02-19 Melbourne - Soundboard Recording
1988-02-19 Tennis Center, Melbourne
1988-07-08 Nothing Is Changed (Modena, Italy) [VBR]
1989-06-12 Globe Arena, Stockholm
1989-06-13 Globe Arena, Stockholm
1989-06-14 Globe Arena, Stockholm
1989-07-01 Palais Omnisport de Paris Bercy, Paris, France
1989-07-15 Live In Venice 1989 {FLAC]
1989-07-15 Venice, Grand Canal
1990 (Waters) The Wall - Live In Berlin
1990-06-30 Of Promises Broken
1990-06-30 The Knebworth Tales
1994-03-30 Miami - The Live Bell
1994-04-16 Your Favorite Disease
1994-04-21 Pigs Over The San Francisco Bay
1994-04-21 They're Blowin Me Away - Oakland Master DAT
1994-05-31 3 Pigs At 3 Rivers
1994-06-11 The Bell Gets Louder
1994-07-18 By The Light Of The Silvery Moon
1994-08-13 The Sound Surrounds
1994-09-04 Softly Spoken Magic Spells - Feyenoord [MP3]
1994-09-13 A Night In Italy
1994-09-13 A Passage Of Time
1994-09-15 Udine - Italy
1994-09-19 - The Nights Of Wonder
1995 Pulse
1995 Wish You Were Here Live (CDM 7243 8 82207 2 9)
2000 (Waters) In The Flesh (Live)
2001-06 2002-01 David Gilmour in Concert (320)
2002-03-05 (Waters) The Happiest Night of Our Lives - National Stadium, Santiago
2005-07-02 Live 8 Reunion
2006-03-07 (Gilmour) Mermaid Theatre - London
2006-03-19 (Gilmour) Regathering Our Senses - Heineken Music Hall, Amsterdam [FA025]
2006-05 (Gilmour) 2007 - Remember That Night
2006-07-29 Happy Birthday Dear Richard (Archive Konigsplatz Munich rec 4)
2006-08-26 (Gilmour) Live In Gdansk
2006-12-07 (Waters) Milan, Italy FM
2007 (Gilmour) 4 Tracks Live From Abbey Road (US Promo CD Single)(320)
2007-03-14 (Waters) 50000 Lunatics on The Grass Chile '07
2007-07-07 (Waters) Live Earth 2007
2008-06-15 (Gilmour) Ron's Psychedelic Supper Vol.2
2010-07-10 (Waters & Gilmour) The Hoping Foundation (320)
2010-09-15 (Waters) The Wall Live - Air Canada Centre, Toronto, ON
2010-09-16 (Waters) The Wall Live - Air Canada Centre, Toronto, ON
2010-09-18 (Waters) The Wall Live - Air Canada Centre, Toronto, ON
2010-09-20 - Roger Waters - The Wall - Chicago [MP3]
2010-12-18 (Waters) Flickering Flames On The Wall - Palacio De Los Deportes, Mexico D.F
2010-12-19 (Waters) Flickering Flames On The Wall - Palacio De Los Deportes, Mexico D.F
2010-12-21 (Waters) Flickering Flames On The Wall - Palacio De Los Deportes, Mexico D.F
2011-03-25 (Waters) Madrid - Experimento
2011-05-15 (Waters) Live At O2 Arena, London, England
2017 Live at Pompeii [FLAC]
David_Gilmour - Live Tracks - MP3
1965 - Syd Barrett - Lucy Leave and Other Rarities [FLAC,Tracks]
1965-95 - Pinkie Milkie - Rarities Compilation
1966-67 London '66 - '67 (UK 1995 CDM SFMDP 3)
1966-67 Psychedelic Games for May
1966-71 Sophisticated Colours
1966-94 Early Flights Disc 1-10
1967 Reaction In G
1967-69 Music For Architectural Students
1967-71 Antiques- A Rare Collection of Oddities
1967-71 Antiques And Curios
1967-87 A CD Full Of Secrets
1968 Tonite Let's All Make Love in London OST
1968-69 The Embryo (TSP-CD-020 1989) [VBR]
1968-70 - Old Symphonies 1968-1970 - FM
1968-70 Ultra Rare Trax Vol. 1-3
1968-71 Spiral
1968-74 From Underground To The Moon
1969 - High Time
1969 - The Complete Zabriskie Point Sessions
1969-70 Omay Yad
1969-99 - Roger Waters - Rarities Vol 1-3
1970-71 - Syd Barrett - The Radio One Sessions
1971-72 Studio Outtakes & Demos
1972-06 From the Other Side (DSOTM Outtakes)
1975 - Tour Comic book
1975-76 Abbey Road to Britannia Row The Extraction Tapes (2014)
1978 The Wall- Under Construction
1978-79 Building The Wall
1979 Every Brick In The Wall (outtakes)
1980 - The Wall - Original Film Sessions 1980
1980 The Wall (Demos)
1982 The Final Cutting
1987 A Momentary Lapse of Reason Live Official Tour CD (Demonstration Not For Sale)
1987 One Slip CDM (UK 1987 CDEM 52)
1988 - A Momentary Lapse Of Reason (Official Tour CD)_flac
1990-05-02 - Roger Waters - The London Rehearsals 1990
1994 - Just Warmin Up - The Rehearsals in Tampa - 1994
Pink Floyd - Just Warming Up (Tampa 1994 )
1996 Pink Floyd & Friends - Interstellar Overdrive (Canada 1996 PS-NEMS 1001-2)
2001 Pink Underground
2005...A Desperate Attempt of Perfection
2010 - Roger Waters - Is It The Fifth
A Tree Full Of Secrets (18xCD Box Rarities)
Have You Got It Yet
2008 Have You Got It Yet v2
HYGIY v2.0 Vol. 1
Live Anthology
Roger Waters - Rarities Vol 1-3
Secret Rarities (2014
Star Profile - audio documentary
Variations on a Theme of Absence 8-CD
1965-72 The Early Years Limited Edition 10CD [FLAC]
1967 The First 3 Singles (Remaster UK 1997 7243 8 59895 2 0)
1967 The Syd Barrett Tapes
1967-11-17 The First Singles
1967-1973 - Anthology II [HL 325-326]
1967-68 Masters of Rock
1967-68 The Early Singles (EU 1992 0777 7 80572 2 2)
1967-71 The Complete BBC Sessions
1967-93 - Total Eclipse - A Retrospective 1967-1993 - Italy
1981 A Collection Of Great Dance Songs (Remaster Japan 2001 TOCP-65744)
1983 Works (US 1983 CDP 7 46478 2)
1988 - Syd Barrett - Opel
1992 - La Carrera Panamericana
1992 - Syd Barrett - Octopus
1995 - Greatest Hits 3 - Post Pink - 1995 - MP3.320kbps
1999 - Legendary Rock Stars - Greatest Hits
2001 - Echoes The Best Of Pink Floyd (US 2001 2xCD CDP 7243 5 36111 2 5)
2003 - Roger Waters - Flickering Flame (320)
2007 - David Gilmour - Take a Best (Bootleg)(320)
2007 - Greatest Hits - Star Mark - 320Kbps
2010 - Syd Barrett - An Introduction to Syd Barrett (2010)
2011 - CD Sampler - 2011
Syd Barrett - Wouldn't You Miss Me -The Best of Syd Barrett
1994 Dark Side Of The Moon -[Trance]
1994 Wish You Were Here [Trance]
1995 Meddle (Trance Remix)
1998 A Momentary Lapse Of Reason (Trance)
2000 Welcome to the Remix
2003 Easy Star All Stars - Dub Side of the Moon
2003-01-01 - The Floydian Propulsion Project
2004 Out There
2005 The Dark Side Of A Dream [320]
2006 DJ Fish Remixes
2006 Pink Floyd & Eric Prydz - Proper Education
2010 DSotM - Moon8 - 8 bits
1995 The London Philharmonic Orchestra - The Music Of Pink Floyd
2002 Pigs and Pyramids An Allstar Lineup Performing the Songs of Pink Floyd
2005 The Piano Tribute To Pink Floyd
2006 Rockabye Baby! Lullaby Renditions of Pink Floyd
- 7. Interviews & Documentaries
1988 - Audio Documentario - Star Profile
2002 - Wish Youd Been Here - The Pink Floyd Story - Radio BBC
1974 - Tour Comic - 1974
1976 - Songbook
1987 - Songbook (VictorF)
2000 - Guitar Tab Anthology
At my most recent Problem Gambling Support Group meeting via Skype (the same one posted on here weekly) it was my turn to do a therapy session. This is my journey from starting gambling until now. I thought it would be worth sharing here as someone may get something from it. It is a bit of a long read.
My name is Mark and i’m a compulsive gambler. My last bet was April 2nd 2019. The day of April 2nd was a massive turning point in my life, it was the day I finally admitted to my long term partner, who is the mother of my two children, and to my parents that I was a compulsive gambler and needed help. The weekend prior was when I finally said to myself I’ve had enough, I had been betting for 14 years and it had beaten me so badly that I was a mess mentally and financially. Although no one knew that because I was an expert at hiding it.
I started gambling like almost anyone in the UK or Ireland, The Grand National. The one day of the year where it seems like every man, woman and child has a bet on. The biggest horse race in the world. That and those glorious holidays spent in Portrush playing the 2p machines (penny fall machines). I don’t for one second blame those experiences for my gambling problem, they are just my first memories of gambling. One really vivid memory I have of gambling was when I was begging my dad for the latest Official Playstation Magazine, the one with the demo disc, and he was just sitting down to watch England play against someone and said to me “if Paul Scholes scores the first goal I will get you the magazine.” Now, I know for a fact win or lose my Dad would have gotten me the magazine, he just said that so I would give him peace to watch the match. Well I remember watching the game with him hoping with all my might Paul Scholes would score 1st and he did. That adrenaline rush, even at a young age (I was 13 years old at most I would say) was unbelievable. Now, again, I am not blaming that for my gambling addiction at all, it is just one of my first vivid memories but that mentality of gambling to get something I want for free would be a regular pattern throughout my gambling career.
Once I turned 18 I opened my first betting account with Blue Sq and that started my online sports gambling journey. Friday nights were spent betting on Wolverhampton all weather horse racing and the Dutch and French 2nd Divisions. All harmless fun, controlled gambling, small stakes. I was still working part time at this stage, left school that summer and gambling was not in the way. Once I got my full time job though that all changed.
The first time I could put my finger on when my gambling changed was the first day of the 2008/2009 football season. I’d been working full time for about 3 years and my gambling was still under control, well, at least I thought it was. My stakes were still low and I was doing football bets at the weekend for a bit of fun. I gambled, but it wasn’t causing me any issues. That Friday I walked into a Paddy Power and decided instead of placing a load of stupid football bets for £1 or £2 I’d pick three teams for the season and do a £20 treble each week. Sheffield United, Leicester City and Leeds United were the picks. Of course, the first weekend it landed (the only time it landed all season I think) and my betting changed from that moment. I genuinely can’t remember the odds but I must have lifted over £100 from that £20 stake and after that staking £1 or £2 just wasn’t appealing. What was the point in that when I could stake £20 and win more. From that moment my gambling started to get out of control over time. Then came the loans, the credit cards and the payday loans.
At some point around this time I had opened a spread betting account due to a sign up offer. Now I did not have the first clue about spread betting but the offer was they gave you a free £100 or something to sign up so I did. I was still living at home at the time and we had one computer which everyone used. Well my Dad stumbled upon this website and was able to access the account (he’s not technically minded so I imagine I left it logged in) and he seen the betting history and he went mental at me. Now, I did explain that it was just bonus funds and I hadn’t actually deposited any of my own money but still the lecture came. It felt like a lecture at the time to me but he was just warning me of the dangers of gambling. Giving me examples of people he knew who had a problem and how easy it is for a gambling problem to begin. So I can never turn around and say that I wasn’t aware of the dangers, I was, my ego was just too big to listen. I paid lip service to the lecture and said I wouldn’t do it again and my Dad took me at my word and trusted me.
So, I knew early on I had a problem. I self excluded from places over the years but never really wanted to quit. I was getting in debt but was able to continue with my lifestyle as I was living at home. I remember one day going to a cheque cashing place where I could write a cheque for £100, dated on my next payday, and they’d give me £90 there and then. I did two cheques for going out that weekend (and a couple of bets on the Aintree Festival) walked straight to the bookies and had the £180 on Denman to win the Aintree Bowl at even money. Denman was a monster of a horse, a machine. He could not lose...then he suffered the first fall of his career. Back I went to the cheque cashing place for another £90 so I could still go out that weekend.
I wasn’t learning from my betting mistakes either as I was just borrowing more money to cover the cracks. I got a few debt consolidating loans over the early years to try and get a handle on my debt but it just gave me an excuse to take out more credit. The payday loans which I used to either gamble or cover my expenses for going out because I used all my money gambling. I would borrow money off my Dad and give him the puppy dog eyes when I paid it back and normally he’d only take half of what I owed him. He thought he was doing the right thing and he wanted me to have money to be able to go out with friends, I was just manipulating the situation.
I moved out and into my friends house for a year and the gambling continued, although I had less money to gamble with. My credit rating was taking a battering but I was young and didn’t really care. Then I met my current girlfriend in February 2010 and we moved in together that September. The gambling continued and was getting worse. I made the smart move to get a second job to supplement my gambling…...at a greyhound track. I’d be earning about £20 a night but gambling £60 or £80. Insanity. We had our first child in April 2012 and not long after she found out I’d be gambling some of the money we’d saved. It wasn’t a lot of money, but she was pissed (rightfully so). I managed to talk my way out of it and that was when I became really good at hiding things. She took control of the rent money and any money for our son so that was never in danger thankfully. We had our daughter in 2016 but the gambling still continued.
It may seem like I have glossed over an important period of time there but the truth is I can’t really remember any of the details. The only details I am able to recall with any great clarity are coming up but I just want to touch on a couple of things from this period. This was a time when I had the biggest wins of my gambling career, two separate occasions. One was an insane run of luck where I couldn’t lose all weekend and ended up with enough money for me, my partner and our Son to have our first and only foreign holiday. Another time I had a £5 free bet and landed a treble at Sandown, all Gary Moore horses and won £3.5k. That money went towards decorating the nursery for my soon to be born Daughter, my partner got money, my Mum and Dad and her Mum and Dad. I bought a PS4 and gambled the rest from memory. The two reasons these moments stick in my head isn’t just the amounts, it’s the only time I walked away in profit, at least for the sessions in question and the reason is that I told my partner I had won the money. That was the only way I knew I wouldn’t gamble it all away because she would ask questions if the money I promised didn’t materialise.
Another part of this time period I want to explore is how I was emotionally. I was 25 when we had our Son and he wasn’t planned. It was a shock to say the least and my life, as I knew it anyways, changed. No longer was I able to do what I wanted socially, I had a Son to provide for. I was working two jobs, money was tight, was I still gambling? Of course I was but slowly I started to strip everything else out of my life. We had our daughter when I was 29 and to be honest here, as much as it sadeness me I thought this way I resented having kids, especially at that age. I felt trapped at times, people I knew were able to do what they want but yet I had all this responsibility. Don’t get me wrong, I loved my kids during this time as well and they meant the world to me, but I do feel that I got into the thought process that I was trapped because of them and my only escape was into the world of online gambling.
I would go through phases where I’d stop altogether for months on end, a year at one point which I imagine was around the time my partner found out about me using the savings for gambling, but I’d always go back to it thinking I was in control but I never was. When gambling I’d deposit £10, lose it, deposit another £10, lose it, rinse and repeat until all my money was gone. If I won it just meant I could gamble longer. It was never about the money. I thought it was, but really the money was the fuel that could keep me gambling longer. Most months I was skint a few days after payday and couldn’t gamble until the next payday. It may not sound like a lot of money but it was a relentless cycle month after month after month.
At the end of 2016 I got an overdraft of £2k and gambled it all on soccer all around the world. Woke up and started gambling in Asia, moved across the globe into the Middle East, Africa, Europe and then fell asleep betting on South American football. It was out of control. Betting on Egyptian football on Xmas Day a particular lowlight. This was what my gambling looked like when I had money. All these bets were in-play as that’s how I gambled, watching a little graphic on Bet365 and thinking I could predict what was going to happen. I also gambled heavily on tennis as well, picking a player to win a set 6-0 was one of my favourites. Generally I would start with £10 as I mentioned and if the bet won I would keep “investing” all the money until it got to a certain amount, normally a couple of hundred quid. Once I got to that point I would raise my stakes significantly because I would tell myself it wasn’t my money. It wasn’t if I didn’t count all the loses it took to get to this point over the previous few days. I would then gamble that until it’s gone cursing myself for not taking the money when I had the chance. Placing the last of my money praying to a god I don’t believe in that if he could just make this bet land then I wouldn’t bet again. Once the money was done I would just sit there, looking at my bank balance, the lack of money, the direct debits due to come out in a few days, trying to figure out how I would survive the next 3-4 weeks until payday. Then I would dust myself off and start working on some budgets. What direct debits I could bounce, who I could ask to borrow money from or maybe what I could sell to fund another round of gambling to try and win my money back.
Coming into 2018 I was in a “good place” with gambling, or so I thought. I was Matched Betting which was a way of making money via bookmakers offers. It worked well for a few months but it all went to shit in the Summer of 2018. Matched Betting introduced me to the casino side of things and I lost £3.5k on roulette. I’ll not go into the ins and outs of how I had that sort of money, lets just say I didn’t and I found a way to deposit via direct debit on PayPal and of course those all bounced. Luckily Paddy Power rewarded me by making me a VIP customer after that, every cloud and all that. So I was chasing big style and getting free £50 bonuses each week from them but I could never get enough money to stop, because no amount was ever going to be enough. Their offers of Money Back if Horse X wins are normally £10 max refund, I was getting £100 max refund. Eventually I was running out of ways to get money and when I started to bet less with Paddy Power they removed my VIP status. I did win £1000 on an NFL bet and lost the lot on roulette the next week. Another lowlight.
The win on the NFL followed by the lose on roulette sticks in my mind because visually it summed up how miserable I was. I had promised my partner back at the start of the year that we would get the living room redecorated and I would pay with it from my Matched Betting and she was happy with that. Of course I explained it was risk free and nothing could go wrong and it wasn’t even gambling. Anyways, come November we are due to have our living room redecorated and of course I do not have the money for it so I have to go to my Mum and Dad. I give them some sob story about how when I was Matched Betting I made a mistake, layed off the wrong horse and lost my money so could then lend me it and don’t tell my partner. It was a complete lie and to be honest at the time I didn’t think they had bought it but they lent me the money. Turns out when I told them about my gambling problem back in April they had smelt bull shit but my Granda (on my Dad’s side) was ill in the hospital and he was stressed about that so he just let it slide. So the redecoration was on and it was going to take a couple of days. One Monday night I had a bet on the NFL and it landed, £10 at 100/1. Happy days, I can give my Mum and Dad back their money, it’s nearly Xmas, this is amazing luck. So on Tuesday night I sat in my half decorated living room and thought if I could just win a little bit more then things would be even better so loaded up the roulette. I lost it all sitting in the living room and during it I could literally see what the money would be paying for but it didn’t stop me, nothing would stop me.
2019 I could feel myself struggling. My life was consumed with gambling or working out how to get money to gamble and then how I was going to pay people back what I owed them. I was in a bad place, I was a bad person, lying, angry but still no one knew the truth. January had always been a tough month as I run several NFL Fantasy Football leagues for money and I am in charge of the money. Of course, that was always gambled away by me and January was the month people expected pay outs because the season was over. Usually I would have won enough money in my leagues to cover it or convince people to pay for next year with their winnings that I could cover it. This year I could not and I had the added pressure of owing people money. A lot of these people were friends of mine I knew personally, others were people I had gotten to know over a few years and only talked online. Either way I had stolen their money and gambled it away. I managed to use my Granda’s death in January as an excuse for why I had not paid people yet, I was in a bad way with the funeral etc, all the excuses, the truth is I was just trying to buy more time.
Then came the weekend prior to April 2nd. I had just been paid and deposited some money into my Bet365 account and managed to get my balance up to £910 on Friday 29th March. I should say by this stage I was fully gambling on tennis. Not match winner, that took too long, generally set winner or next game winner as that was quicker. Now this £910 would have cleared some of my urgent debts to allow me to continue on gambling. All I had to do was withdraw, and I was going to…...once I got it up to a nice round £1000. As you can guess I lost the lot. £300-£400 on Benoit Paire was one of the worst hits but I was gambling like a mad man. That was how I bet when I had winnings, the stakes got out of control. By the time I was leaving work at 6pm on the Friday the whole £910 was gone. I was betting on ATP, Challenger, ITF, any tennis that was on I was betting on it. Back in the day I remember betting on a tennis match where they had one ball. Still a story that brings a smile to my face if I’m honest. A smile that consists of a mixture of shame and cringe. That Friday night I deposited whatever I had left in and managed to win back a good chunk of the money, but it still wasn’t enough. It still wasn’t what I had before. So the whole weekend went like that, up and down, up and down. I went to a family dinner and sat betting on my phone the whole night. That’s how my life has been the last number of years, i’m present at gatherings, or nights out but my mind is deep in my phone gambling away not giving a shit about anyone.
Eventually the money ran out that weekend. I was a mess. I could have actually made it work financially and gotten through the month but mentally I was gone. I could tell my brain had put me into a nosedive and the only way this was all ending was in disaster. Maybe not this month, or this year but I was being flown towards rock bottom.
I sat down on the Monday and wrote out everything that I owed, who I owed it to, a budget going forward. It was grim enough reading, £18k in the hole. The money wasn’t the issue, it was how it was making me feel, the time I’ve been wasting. The fact that I finally couldn’t take anymore, that I was ready to wave the white flag and say gambling has won, it defeated me. I found out when and where the nearest GA Meeting was to me and wrote that down too. So I found a set of balls and on the Tuesday I told my girlfriend. My attitude was that life can’t be any worse for me than it currently is. I was a mess, I cried, I honestly expected her to tell me to get out and I wouldn’t have blamed her, but she was amazing. She was angry obviously, but she was so supportive. Then I called my parents round and told them. They were disappointed, confused but also really supportive. Then the next day I told my closest friends who were again all really supportive. I owe them some money too and they’ve been great about setting up a payment plan to pay that back. I can imagine some people saying that I didn’t hit rock bottom in comparison to others, I felt that way myself to be honest. I felt like I had gotten off lightly but looking back the cycle I was in was soul destroying and although I didn’t cause the devastation others have caused I knew I needed to reach out for help as I couldn’t do it on my own.
I registered for GAMStop and self excluded online for 5 years which has taken the avenue of online gambling away from me. A vital step if online is your vice. I also handed over control of my finances to my partner which again removed another temptation. I’ve since learned in recovery that gamblers need 3 things, time, opportunity and money, take away one of those and you won’t be able to gamble. I took away two with these simple steps.
I then went to my first GA Meeting on Wednesday 3rd April. The time doesn’t suit me for that, Monday at 9pm is my meeting but I felt I needed to get to one ASAP. I don’t know what I expected GA to be, some sort of church run cult filled with a bunch of old men desperate for a bet but it’s one of the most amazing groups I’ve ever found. It’s a dumping ground for all my shit and it’s a place where I can listen to other people’s stories. Without sounding sexist, it’s something a lot of men could do with outside of addiction, a place to talk about life and how they are feeling. I take a 50 mile round trip every Monday to get there. When I was gambling if I had to travel 50 miles to get internet to gamble you can guarantee I’d have travelled every day. When I leave a meeting I am buzzing, for all the right reasons. I’m a lifer when it comes to GA now and I am fine with that.
I am also a member of the Problem Gambling Support Group and we run three meetings a week via Skype. This group has been so influential to my recovery and I have met so many good people I now consider friends through it. The topic meeting style is completely different to what happens at my own GA so it fits into my recovery perfectly and gives me a different perspective.
I have a sponsor, who has had a massive impact on my recovery. He has helped me work the Steps and is always there if I need him. At times it’s hard to tell who is sponsoring who but that sort of dynamic works well for me as I see him as a friend first and sponsosponsee second.
I have also found a passion for writing about my journey and post my stuff on my blog, on GamCare and on the Reddit Problem Gambling Sub. I have been told my stuff is very good and people seem to get a lot from it. As I explained at a recent meeting I am still learning how to deal with praise, it makes me feel awkward. I’m not sure if it’s from years of not wanting to be the focus of people's attention because of the fear they might ask questions and my addiction would be exposed. Whatever the reason I am working on being able to accept praise and enjoy it and as I was told at the last meeting...a simple thank you is usually enough.
I’ve been clean for over 9 months now, and I have not struggled with urges to gamble. My life is amazing, it always was but I was too wrapped up in my addiction to notice. I literally had everything I could ever want. I have an amazing partner and two amazing children along with my parents who are absolutely fantastic. I have my health, a job and my friends are another support network I couldn’t do without now. They stood by me when I admitted my problem and they gave me the belief that I could do this.
Recovery is now my focus along with my family. The debt can be managed, stopping gambling is one day at a time, but the main focus of my recovery will be fixing my character defects, helping others, being open and honest to people and not being a selfish asshole. I would like to think those that know me now can at least drop the selfish part when describing me.
I have put plenty of work into my recovery and I feel like I am getting the benefits out of it. I have a routine when it comes to meetings and they don’t impact on my family life. Is every day amazing? No it’s not. Some days are rather boring and some days are tough, but that’s life. Some days you have to make chicken salad out of chicken shit. I have accepted what I am, I am a compulsive gambler and I need to be the one who changes. No one else around me needs to change, I am the common denominator. I have noticed a change in myself and those closest to me. They all seem happier, more content, happy to have this me in their life and not the old me. I wasn’t a nice partner, father, son or friend when I was in active addiction. I don’t want to be the person I was before I started gambling either because I am pretty convinced he was an asshole as well. I am using this recovery to become the man I want to be, the man I can look in the mirror and be proud to be.
As I said, I have accepted that I am a compulsive gambler and I cannot have a single bet because it will lead me back to active addiction. I have no issues with the gambling industry or people who gamble, I just know that I am unable to gamble as it ends in disaster. I feel there should be more discussion around problem gambling and the industry should be putting more money into helping problem gamblers and to help identify problem gamblers. It’s a fine line though, as I know if a bookie told me they felt I had a problem and wouldn’t accept a bet I’d have been angry and just went somewhere else. You need to be ready for recovery to fully embrace it. I never was until April 2nd. For the people in recovery we need to be ready to help those that get to the stage where they are ready for recovery. We are the ones who these people will come to rely on as we’ve been through it, you can tell when talking to someone who hasn’t had a gambling addiction they just don’t understand. Over the coming years I think there will be a significant rise in people looking for help with problem gambling. I don’t feel like my story is close to the worst out there and I have read and heard some people who have the opinion that you need to cause devastation before recovery will work. That’s bollocks and that sort of attitude is why GA is filled with old men and young people are reluctant to stay. I have come to believe it doesn’t matter how much you have lost, how many relationships you have destroyed or what age you are, all you need is a desire to stop gambling and that is the qualification for entering recovery.
For now though, for me, my next bet won’t be about the money I lose, I’ll lose my partner and my children as well and that’s not a bet that I am not willing to make.
Mark
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