Best Casinos Near Me - February 2021: Find Nearby Casinos

This year has started off terrible. I’m already down 500-600 units (I’d have to look at my notes to be exact, but I’m too angry and ashamed right now to look) on a conservative 1-6 spread at nearest/best Indian casino near me (Hard Rock in Wheatland).
It seems like every set of decks (playing their $15-$25 3:2 DD game: ~75% pen, DA2, DAS, H17, No RSA, No LS) has gone negative, and those that did go positive, I was getting shafted with 12-15 and busting/losing, and push or lost with 20-21-BJ (pushed an unreal number of times on 20).
I can’t help but feel like I’m doing something wrong, but I know I’m counting right, I’m following BS and deviations right, but to be down this hard - an extension of late last year’s losing run - just doesn’t feel right.
Maybe it’s all just really, really bad variance... but man. Shit sucks and it’s starting to wear at the fun of playing. Any advice?

Warning: Possible Triggers in the story below
I have decided part of my recovery will include writing out every little detail I can remember about the long road astray that gambling has caused my life. Today is day one and I am ready to reclaim my life from this evil that exists in the world, again. A short recap of the most recent events before I hit the details: Gambling addict for 12 years and went 1 year 4 months without gambling a dime before letting a $100 dollar deposit become a $10,000 mistake again. I am writing this for myself as a reminder and for others, as reading others stories on this subreddit was one of the tools I used to make it a year and four months without gambling.
BEFORE KNOWING I HAD A PROBLEM
I turned 18 and vividly remember my dad taking me and my mom to an indian casino for my birthday. I was so excited seeing the ads on TV and wanting to go try my luck on my parents dime but the worst thing that could happen, happened. I hit $400 on a $4 dollar bet playing slots. I had not made $400 all summer working my ass off, but was able to make it in 20 seconds at this casino. From this moment on, I was hooked. As everyone knows, the worst thing that can happen as a gambler is to win big and at 18 this was a massive amount of money to win. From 18-22 I kept my stakes low and would only bring $50-$100 to the casinos because of the lack of funds and I can recall feeling physically ill if I had lost it. I was a college student so at the time I did not have much money to spend and it truly was a leisurely activity until I went one afternoon and hit $2400 on quickhits on a $2 bet. I had found the secret to being rich, it was playing slots at the casino. I still recall being frugal and keeping my bet sizes from 25 cents to a $2 max due to no income and solely relying on my parents providing me with a little side cash going back and forth from visiting my parents to going back to college. At this point of my life gambling seemed like a fun easy way to make cash, I was all about that.
I graduated from college and found a very promising career in sales. I was making very good money and living the dream free of all worries. I really didn’t gamble all too often as the nearest casino was 3 hours away, that was until I discovered the world of online gambling. Then the addiction kicked in.
STARTING TO RECOGNIZE A GAMBLING PROBLEM
I started watching gambling streams on youtube and couldn’t believe how much money people would make on the online slots. I live in the USA so I only had a handful of options of casinos I could play at. I started making multiple $25 deposits a day to try my luck and had some ups but mostly downs. One day I hit big online and tried withdrawing my winnings. Sure enough, a check from what appeared to be China hit my mail and was in my bank account. The online US casinos were limited game wise and the more I played the more I felt like I was getting scammed but that didn’t stop me. I joined a gambling online forum and learned of ways to bypass the US restrictions and was free to play the “good” games that were available in other countries. I never knew if I did win whether or not I would receive the winnings but this had now turned into double gamble which made the excitement intensify. Sure enough, I won another 2k online betting $1. I remember thinking to myself, why would anyone work when you can make this kind of money sitting in your own living room having fun. Well, as fate would have it, that 2k online diminished as I purchased a total of 5k worth of gift cards to make deposits at the casino and lost it all plus my savings over a 3-6 month period of time. That left a nasty taste in my mouth and now I had debt for the first time. I had to escape this debt somehow and kept playing slots and running my bank account to 0 every paycheck. Depression started to kick in and eventually playing slots lead me to self-harm and suicidal tendencies.
RECOGNIZING GAMBLING ADDICTION
I still was hooked on online slots even though I was in debt but ran out of all of my money. Thats when I discovered I could sign up for a credit card and get cash advances. Over a period of 5 years I racked up a surmounting 15k worth of credit card cash advances which put myself in a position where I could barley make minimum payments on all the cards I had opened and have any spare cash at the end of the month. This fed my addiction as it was the only way I knew I could get out and sure enough, I would max out my cards and hit big again on the very last deposit available to me. I would go from 15k of debt to 2k of debt overnight and would swear that I would never play again. We all know how that went and would teeter totter back and forth from having money in the bank to maxing out my credit cards and having only rice to eat for the month. This is when I knew I had a problem but had no clue how to fix it. I brought my family into the situation, told them what I had done when I finally didn’t win and had maxed out all and they were disappointed but helped and gave me money. The money of course went to gambling and so the cycle continued.
FULL BLOWN ADDICT
I worked hard and was good at my job and was able to stop gambling for a period of time and save enough money to purchase a house. I had a new life ahead of me, a new house and a new best friend in my dog. I had real responsibilities now and cut back on gambling. I stopped playing online as much and started driving the 3 hour drive to the casino to try my luck there. This is where the worst thing that could possibly happen, happened. I won and I won big. I remember bringing $500 to the casino and turning that into $1600. What a rush, but then lost it all. Then as you all know the ATM trips started up and I 0’d out my bank account and decided to try higher denomination slots as a last resort. I put $1200 into a $25 machine and won $25,000. I could not believe my luck, it had to be fate. I went home that night knowing this was my new job, PRO SLOT PLAYER. I called in sick at work the next day because there was more money to be made and off I went to my new job 3 hours away at 3 am in the morning because I couldn’t wait to get there and start playing. I started small and made 3 trips to the ATM at $500 withdrawals. On the last trip, I hit $20,000 on a $2 machine. I made $45,000 in a matter of 48 hours, which was a years pay at my current job. I had everything figured out and I was going to be rich.
FUCK GAMBLING
That new savings nest egg that was sitting in my bank disappeared within 6 weeks of my new job playing high stakes slots. Cash advances and depression were my new reality. I ran my credit cards up until they were all completely maxed out and now was back to the same reality of living paycheck to paycheck only making minimum payments on my cards. I reached out to family again and they came through again for me if I promised to stop once and for all. They wrote me a check for $18,000 to pay off all credit cards with the stipulation that I never gamble again. We all know how that turned out, I withstood from gambling for a good two months then after I had a nice savings built up started playing online and at the casinos again. Within 3 months I had maxed everything out again and here I was back in the same situation I was in earlier but this time had betrayed my own family. I went back to the old ways of self-harm and had another suicidal attempt that failed. I was my own worst enemy at the time and had no idea how to stop and no money to gamble. Around this time, I was hit with layoffs which was what I took as a sign that I had one more chance to hit big and make it right with my family and myself. I was getting 3 months worth of pay in 2 weeks. Time to hit the casino and win 50k. I never hit big that night, I lost my 3 months severance pay and had no answers, only an insurmountable weight on my shoulders. I had to sell my house and move in with family until I could find another job. The same family who I also owed $18,000 to and whom knew about the addiction and betrayal. Years went by and I would have good months and then I would run up my cards other months playing online. I didn’t have any bills so I would make my minimum payments and use my checks and continue this disgusting cycle for 4 years. I felt like a complete loser and the only way out was to hit big again. I would hit big countless times online and would withdraw it to my bank account only to re-deposit it the next week and lose. It is literally the most miserable cycle and so draining mentally and physically.
ROAD TO RECOVERY
I stumbled across a podcast of Joe Rogan’s with a guest named David Goggins. This man is the baddest dude on this planet and the stories he shared on that podcast made me wake up and stop being the victim and realize no one gives a shit and only you can fix you. It was a mindset I needed as I had been the victim for the past 10+years in my own mind. I started researching gambling addiction and what I could do to stop it and became obsessed. I removed myself from all online casinos, stopped watching gambling videos, added gamblock to my PC and phone, and started working out. I bought his audio book and listened to it countless times while exercising. I had a new mindset and I was going to beat this mother fucker. The hours spent staring into a pc screen were now on the road running or learning a good habit like mediation or how to play guitar ect…. I had finally found something that worked, a routine and threw the victim card away. No one was going to save me but myself and I was damned determined to do so. Along the way, I also met someone whom I fell in love with. My life was all starting to come together and I was less than a few months away from paying off nearly 48k worth of debt from gambling. I also listened to Allen Carr’s Easy Way To Stop Gambling audiobook which I highly suggest. Well, as luck would have it COVID-19 strikes and I am working from home now which means I have a lot of spare time on my hands and no one glancing at my personal PC during the quiet times. I started watching more gambling streams on twitch and saw how easy these guys are making bank online gambling. I knew in my mind that these guys are probably not playing with their own money but the little monster snuck up and told me to go ahead and try my luck one time. I made a $100 dollar deposit online that turned into a $10,000 mistake chasing that first $100 lost and now here I am set back another 6 months. I turned back into the lying, deceiving piece of shit that I once was, only now I do see an end to all of this and know the path I have to take to get my life back. I’ve closed my online accounts, removed access to credit cards, will be installing gamblock today, and going back to healthy habits to keep my mind at ease. I already have found relief in writing this and hoping that it will help one person to stay on the road of recovery or decide to take that path. You will never win and if you do win you will give it all back plus more. Do not kid yourself. If you are on this subreddit you are addicted and you cannot casually gamble. I know this sounds harsh but being harsh is what helped me get to where I was before, its what I had to have to get my life straightened out. It is the David Goggins - no bullshit - tell it like it is approach. Get after it guys, tell gambling to FUCK OFF and beat this beast with me.
David Goggins Podcast I highly recommend:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5tSTk1083VY
https://youtu.be/BvWB7B8tXK8
Books that helped me:
Can't hurt me- David Goggins
The Easy Way to Stop Gambling- Allen Carr

Well, I've gone and done it again. Another chapter of blabbering! I guess by this point some of you must be gluttons for punishment or at least chitter chatter so I won't apologize. In fact if anything this is all your fault for encouraging me! See what you have wrought?! Anyway you're all in for the long haul anyway!
So enjoy!
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Chapter 1
Chapter 30
“They’re not as good as I was expecting.” Raven looked at another of the cookies she was nibbling on slowly.
“Store bought are never as good. They’ve got to have some very strict tolerances for shelf life and allergies, and all that. But they’re not bad. Sugar, flour, chocolate, the main ingredients are all there.” Ham shrugged a little as he ate one.
“That’s because you idiots don’t know the splendor that is excess.” Brandy-Lynn teased as she smushed down her cookie, candy bar, chocolate syrup, peanut butter, sprinkles, and powdered sugar sandwich monstrocity.
“Yeah I’m not sure I’m that hungry.” Raven eyed the abomination that Brandy-Lynn then tried to figure out a way to pick up and eat even as it began to melt over her hands.
“That’s a day’s worth of calories right there.” Jaeger shook his head slowly as he watched her try to eat it even as it fell apart a little, making it even more of a mess. “You do know at some point in the last few millennia some of your evolutionary cousins have learned to eat with tools and not just smear their food all over the place.”
“Quitters.” Brandy-Lynn muttered as she gave up on trying to eat it as one coherent sandwich and began to just feed chunks of her dessert disaster into her mouth one at a time, ignoring how much chocolate and peanut butter was getting smeared around.
“I’m seriously going to have to take you outside and hose you off.” Jaeger sighed and shook his head even as the others chuckled and enjoyed their far more simple cookies.
“I have a question for you all. If I can.” Raven said then as she looked around the table.
“You certainly can. But may you?” Figs asked with an arched eyebrow.
“Yes, she may you pedantic tool.” Jaeger answered with a roll of his eyes.
“Max asked you guys the other night about the scariest place you’ve been… what about the nicest?” She looked around once more that usual innocent smile she had. “Or like… a place you’d really like to go back to.”
“Huh.” Ham frowned a little as they all began to think on it. It wasn’t a question they really had much of a chance to consider during their work as Revenants.
“Maui 718.” Jaeger answered after thinking it over for a minute.
“Oh yeaaaah. That place… yeah that’s got my vote.” Figs nodded.
“I can see it. Even if it was a bit… traditional in the sense of an idyllic paradise that doesn’t make it bad.” Ham agreed.
“What’s Maui 718?” Raven asked of course.
“We got pulled off of R&R early because they’d picked up an automated distress beacon from a UNSD research facility. One that we had no records of, so it was flagged as critical. We went in blind because as mentioned we had no records of it. The idea of some old UNSD facility sending out a distress call a century after the war had ended worried a lot of people. Lots of theories on what horrors we might find there. And we had to tunnel three systems beyond the nearest gate from Sol so this place was beyond remote. It wasn’t on any charts, and its very existence was a surprise.” Jaeger started off and Raven looked worried.
“But when we got there we found a paradise world with just nothing but an automated facility with nothing in it. They’d sent in construction bots and a single foreman to set it up but they never actually followed up with anything else. The foreman had died of old age some… twenty to thirty years prior to our arrival and the only reason the distress beacon went off is because the expiration date on the base’s medical supplies finally passed. Even an automated facility with no living personnel has to have current medical supplies. And that was it.” Jaeger shrugged.
“That’s sort of sad the foreman was all alone though.” Raven frowned a little.
“Not to him.” Jaeger smirked a little. “He had journals that he wrote sporadically, sounded like the guy loved it. So… let me explain the world a little because as I mentioned it was a paradise but it was also mostly water. Even more so than Earth. It was like… 15% dry land? The base was set up in this zone of islands where the water was… pure. I guess is the best way to describe it. Just… this great vast clear blue perfect water. The base was built into these rock pillars that provided it this unmatched view of the whole area and the sunsets and sunrises both were… phenomenal. It was warm year round without being too hot, and the shallow water was heated enough to be refreshing without being too cold. So the foreman realized what had happened and just spent his life fishing, exploring, and painting.”
“It was trippy to see some of it.” Figs added. “He had a whole base worth of bots to work with and figured out some way to make paint from local materials and just painted these massive murals across the pillars in the ocean. He had named all the local species of fish and had lists on how to best cook them and the local fruits and veggies. Even made his own rum.”
“That was good rum too.” Tanya nodded, of course weighing in on the alcohol.
“Since they’d cut our R&R short for this they let us stay a week and make sure there wasn’t any hidden facilities or the like. They even landed Elysium in the ocean and let the crew have fun. It was pretty amazing. The protected cove the main base’s pillar was situated in was perfect for swimming and diving and body surfing… just whatever. And those fruits were great.” Jaeger sighed a little at the thought.
“Oh they were amazing.” Figs nodded. “Picture this sort of… lime citrus flavor, but add a dash of vanilla and it’s more on the sweet side, and eaten like an orange. But not like… super sweet. Just… just enough.”
“Not enough sugar.” Brandy-Lynn muttered as she swallowed one of the last chunks of her own sugar filled mess and downed some more purple drank.
“Zero people are surprised to hear you say that.” Jaeger shook his head a little.
“Plus while I can see why some people would like that sort of planet it’s too easy. Take just about any untouched habitable world and you’ll get some similar results.” She shrugged off. “No, if I were to pick a world we need to return to someday it’s Vegas.”
Jaeger and the others had a variety of chuckles and groans in reaction to her comment. “Don’t you get enough sin?” Jaeger asked.
“It’s not just that! It’s the pinnacle of the human spirit!” She insisted. “We took a barren world that was just barely habitable and only noteworthy because it was situated along a good trade route junction and while most people would have just settled for a few orbital stations and some water refineries on the poles we took one look at it and went ‘nah fam I got this.’ And it became the glory that is Vegas!” She raised her hands at the end.
“It’s hardly unique to have a planet with gambling.” Figs scoffed.
“It’s so much more than that! They made that world glow! It never slept! They slapped casinos and magrails all over that planet and made a desert gorgeous! The rainbow sands, the mineral springs, the gorge, you could find so many amazing natural features that would have otherwise been passed over just because the planet is drab from orbit! And the lights! This was a world that was most beautiful at night! The neons, the spotlights, the biolumes! It had everything! There was no end to the party! No rest for the wicked! Every human, and xeno sin and vice could be enjoyed at any time, on every day.” She grinned.
“By devouring vast quantities of power and resources far outscaling the population it had.” Figs countered. “Of course you’d be in love with the most excessive and consumption driven world in human history! Even more so than Earth and that’s saying something!”
“Ah you’re just a hater.” Brandy-Lynn waved him off.
“She’s allowed to have the planets she misses most.” Jaeger cut in to end their argument before it went anywhere else. “Anyone else have planet’s they missed most?”
“Dean’s world.” Ham spoke up as the others nodded slowly.
“Ah, that’s a good trippy world.” Brandy-Lynn agreed.
“What’s Dean’s world?” Raven asked.
“It was… mmhhh… a strange planet… Very surreal fauna created by a rather unique atmospheric system. The ground level wasn’t actually habitable by humans due to toxic gasses and pressure. But at a certain point in the sky it was not only habitable but pleasant. So cities were created in the skies atop these massive spindly mountains that looked like coral formations. One of those niche worlds that attracted specific people but wasn’t ideal for any particular industry. Though it did have a decent chemical refinement base. And tourism due to the unusual nature of the world.” Jaeger explained.
“You could wear protective suits and dive from the sky to the ground on these glide packs and weave between the formations. It was amazing to just drop out of the clouds.” Ham smiled at the memory, which the pilot obviously enjoyed.
“That sounds really cool. Think we can go there someday?” Raven gave Jaeger a big hopeful smile though he frowned in response.
“Ah… maybe someday. But it’s not in Pact space so I have no idea if it’s even inhabited anymore.” He explained.
“It’s not? But… the Pact is made up of all the pre-war governments. Shouldn’t that mean all the old systems?” She asked with a frown of her own.
“Eeehhh…” Jaeger slowly tilted his head side to side. “The pact territory now represents only something like 20% of all civilized systems before the war. Between what the Hive still has in the core, the Crusader territory which is mostly Ravex, the Death’s Door periphery of Devari space, and the quarantine zones there’s a lot less to Pact space than you’d think. There’s another… 20% that’s in a patchy quasi connected state that’s the new fringe. Everything else? Lost. With the collapse of the F.V.S. the Pact lacks the resources and the technical know how to revive the dead gates.”
“Really? I read up about how the Pact is rebuilding all the time. The posts detail their programs to restore quality of life and infrastructure and all that. We see those big freighters from the valley taking food off world. I know you’ve talked about this being the post apocalypse and all that but… I thought that was a bit of exaggeration. Were that many systems destroyed in the war?” Her frown had deepened at the thought.
“Most of them aren’t destroyed. Just… lost. The gate network provided easy, safe, and reliable FTL travel around the galaxy. Never mind that it left a patchwork of systems that weren’t always geographically connected in real space. Many of these systems are probably surviving on their own or with limited gate connections. Solavis and the most developed systems are all only a jump or two off of the hub systems in the Void so they’re working to make what territory they very solidly control strong before they try to expand. Humanity will survive even when cut off from the rest of the galaxy.” Jaeger assured her.
“You think so?” Raven looked thoughtful at that.
“I’m sure.” Jaeger nodded. “This isn’t the first time humanity has faced down the end and survived. The ice age, the bubonic plague, the climate catastrophe, all incidents that led to the death and destruction of vast swathes of humanity. And we also returned. Hell, the climate catastrophe was directly responsible for the Void colonization efforts that saw humanity explode across the stars. Do you think the smaller Slavic nations were enthusiastic about joining a Russian lead space program? Or south east asians having to hitch a ride with the Chinese? Or the Indians? Not really. But over a billion people die and prospects on earth look bleak so they take what they can get. They reforge their identities and now we’ve got the SSR, the Five Dragons, the Antarens, the Chakra and the Voiders themselves.”
“Well… we did. Now we have the Pact.” Tanya pointed out.
“Yeah… I’m still not sure how they plan to unite us all with Xenos. Humanity has never been ruled under a single shared government before.” Jaeger shrugged at the thought. “But so long as the Crusaders and Hive both remain prevalent threats we’ll stay somewhat together at least.”
“We’re still not under a single government. There’s the Hive holdouts.” Figs mentioned.
“Ah.” Jaeger just waved a hand dismissively. “They don’t count. They might as well be insects for all it matters in regards to their species. What I’m trying to say is humanity will go on. We become callus to the needs of our survival. What was unthinkable can become routine if it means we survive. There is no end to which we will push ourselves in order to survive as a species. But… at the same time this nature ensures it will happen again. In some way.” He shook his head slowly and sighed.
“Another Hive war? Well we’re going to have to finish them off for sure.” Brandy-Lynn nodded.
“Not that… or not exactly. I mean we’ll probably face another cataclysmic event of similar scale. Not anytime soon, and not in my lifetime. Hell maybe not for centuries… but eventually. I mean this was our fault… not just us as Revenants. But as a species. We became so successful that governments lost sight of what they were supposed to be. They thought of themselves as entities who existed to further their own power and control. But they lost sight of the fact that they were supposed to do this for the betterment of the people over who they ruled. Instead they were seizing power for the sake of power itself only. The shadow wars were all about each nation trying to ensure an open war wouldn’t break out between them with the Void states being paranoid enough to strike at everyone. Ally and Enemy alike equally.” Jaeger reminded them.
“And in the end they were all now filled with citizens who were unhappy with what their governments were doing supposedly in their name. They were so focused on fighting each other they failed to realize they were cultivating the seeds of their own destruction from inside. It’s not like the Hive sprang up out of nothing. The unemployed, unfulfilled, aimless masses gave them all the conscripts they needed.” Tanya nodded as she finished the line of thought that Jaeger had started.
“Success itself is not a sin. I mean… who doesn’t want more and better stuff. A way to leave your kids more than you had? But… this is what I mean with becoming callus. Those who suffer hardship en masse then learn to flourish in whatever is left. We become more and more successful until hardship of that scale is but a distant memory… and that’s when it all goes wrong again because no one in power remembers those hardships and what caused them. We are survivors because we are doomed to repeat ourselves. It is what makes us great, even if it makes us suffer. And we’re just bringing xenos along for the ride now.” Jaeger shook his head as the others chuckled a little.
“I’m sure they’re capable of survival on their own.” Raven suggested. “The Ravex grew up on a brutal volcanic world, the Jipasi have always been adaptable, the Kra’Kto’Sui can survive almost any ocean and the Davari built themselves up from being abandoned on a strange world. You don’t think they’d survive on their own?”
“I don’t mean it like that. I just mean… we’re probably a detriment to them. If we can’t get along with each other what chance is there to get along with xenos?” Jaeger shrugged.
“I think it’s time though. The Pact promises equality and democracy. And they’re making it work! There’s a chance we’ll come out of this with a nation for all of us. No more need for shadow wars or anything like that.” Raven’s optimistic attitude always made Jaeger smile and this was no exception. He didn’t feel like bursting her bubble with his own doubts of their continued cohesion once enough worlds were rebuilt to the point of standing on their own and how old divides might be made fresh.
“Speaking of survival though, have you done your chores today?” He asked her.
“What? No.” She frowned in surprise at the question.
“Well you’re always supposed to get your chores done.” He wagged a finger at her.
“But you guys fought a battle! I couldn’t think about anything else!” She huffed.
“That’s why I’m not mad that you’ve put them off till now but you gotta go do them before bed. Now get to it.” Jaeger nodded his head a the door.
“But…” Raven looked around the table and pouted as several of the others chuckled a little.
“We’ll have time to hang out other days. You want me to save the galaxy? You have to do your chores so I can focus on that.” Jaeger eyed her as she rolled her eyes and made a face.
“Fine.” She agreed and got up from the table to put her dishes away.
“Ah.” Jaeger shifted his seat back and opened his arms as she came around to give him a hug. “I’ll get the dishes you go get your work done.” He told her as he hugged her tight.
“Okay dad.” She nodded and headed off out the door. They watched her go and just as the door to the cafeteria closed Brandy-Lynn spoke first.
“Shit. Fuck. Tits. Coooock.” She gasped out as if she would have exploded holding it in any longer.
“I will give you some credit lasting as long as you did you whiskey tango twat.” Figs snickered as he watched Brandy-Lynn who just flipped him off only for Figs to flip her off back.
“Settle down. We need to talk strategy. We’ve got the lead on two keys for sure as mentioned. Figs, Brandy-Lynn what do you need to do to get with your people on tracking down leads on the others?” He looked between them.
“A quick trip back to Sol town to sign off on a few transfers.” Figs answered.
“I could probably shove my boot up the appropriate ass from here but I think I might as well give it a personal touch as well.” Brandy-Lynn shrugged.
“You might want to check up on that Titan agent Sarge. Wasn’t there mention of another agent meeting with her tomorrow? What if it’s one of Alvarez’s men?” Tanya reminded him.
“Shit…” Jaeger looked at his watch. The night had begun and he could see the stars coming out from the cafeteria window but hadn’t really thought about what that would mean.
“We can handle it. Just have Ham drop us off.” Figs gave the pilot a look.
“No, she knows me. I’ll do it.” Jaeger shook his head. “I’m not short on amp.”
“It’s better than traditional Colombian cocaine coffee that’s for sure.” Brandy-Lynn grinned wide at the mention of the battle drug.
“Isn’t that stuff hazardous for your health?” Max asked with a frown even as the others laughed.
“Yes.” Jaeger ignored the others as they laughed. “But sometimes one has to keep going on little to no sleep. I’ll nap where I can. It’s not like I’ve never done it before. While we’re in the city I want you to check the wreck of the Nautilus.” Jaeger looked at Tanya.
“Alone?” She asked.
“I can’t spare anyone. Figs has his thing about the ocean-”
“I don’t fuck around with the ocean and it doesn’t kill me. That’s the agreement we’ve got.” Figs cut in.
“Brandy-Lynn always wrecks the sub-”
“All of those events were unrelated and entirely not my fault!” She huffed.
“And Ham is piloting the vetall.” Jaeger kept speaking ignoring their outbursts.
“What about me? I can help.” Max perked up a bit.
“I need you here to oversee fortifications. I’m going to have to go a little more… overt than we used to until this is all over and deal with the repercussions later.” Jaeger shook his head.
“What? I want to help!” Max insisted.
“You are helping Max. It might seem like I’m leaving you out but I’m not. I have to be in Sol town and you’re the only other person with any command experience. Especially managing bots between here and the Port Authority.” Jaeger explained.
“Oh, one battle, some experience.” Max snorted.
“Training. You’ve had training for this. We were all trained in combat but not command like you’re dealing with. I had a little as Sergeant Major but… I’m just not… I don’t think that way.” Jaeger shrugged.
“If we get Lard back in the air he can do both. It’s not like we’ll need to go dark for this.” Tanya looked between them for a moment.
“Alright. But your focus is fortification. If the Hive make another move, or Marque, or Alvarez we might need to be ready to withstand a more coordinated assault. So get a list of every available bot here and in the city. See if anything can be repaired and…” He trailed off for a moment as he thought. “Ham, how hard would it be to get the reservists online?”
“Getting them online? Not that hard… getting them from my place to here? Uuhhhh… pppfff…” The pilot slowly filled his cheeks up with air and then let it out. “I can’t do it with what we’ve got. It would be way to inefficient to use the Hawk or even the Gecko, and if we called in a favor to get something bigger it’ll be painfully obvious.”
“What about… Can any of them drive? Don’t you have those old Quad and a halfs? Ha...lves?” Jaeger stumbled over the word a moment.
“Uh yeah… but I’m pretty sure people will notice some APCs rolling around the mountains.” Ham snorted.
“So? Slap Pact markings on them and then park a few up the road to close off traffic. People are probably expecting some sort of Pact activity after the battle yesterday.” As Jaeger said that Ham looked thoughtful.
“Yeah alright. I can drop you three off, swing back, get that going, and be back to pick you up.” He nodded.
“After that we’ll come back and then I’ll take Brandy-Lynn and Figs north to Gullhaven to find the Galileo wreck while you three keep building up. Maybe see about making our own uglies if we need to. Think we can Tanya?” He looked over at her as she sighed.
“Maybe… We’ve got the facilities but… I know jack shit about setting up assembly work. I made my two by hand and that won’t cut it here… What about a Centipede? We’ve got that scrap yard up the beach.” She glanced at Ham.
“Fuck off.” The pilot snorted. “A few old APCs sure, that might not get much attention. But a base crawler? People are going to fucking notice. Especially since they were Absolute Dynamic’s babies and no one else had any. That’ll bring the real military down on our heads.”
“Alright.” Jaeger waved them off. “See what you can do small scale.”
“Why the emphasis on bot combat anyway?” Max asked as the others looked his way. “I mean… Can’t you guys call in favors? Aren’t there other Revenants out there?”
“No one who can get here in time… And even then we’re not well connected anymore. We scattered to the winds when Titan began to hunt people down at the end of the war.” Jaeger reminded him. “We’re most familiar with bots anyway. We’re not front line soldiers on our own. We’re force multipliers. You saw the battle today. We’re limited to small scale units tactics and rely on your ability to marshall the bots into an actual line. The Void had a fraction of the population of the other majors. Their military was… 90% bots?” Jaeger glanced at Ham.
“93% of ground forces but only 64% of naval. The idea was to use organic soldiers in concentrated forces and then use bots to flesh out the line between them. The Void military was highly specialized. Urban combat, arctic, jungle, forest, mountain, siege assault, siege defense, every possible terrain and mission had at least one unit for the task with more generalist bots as needed to pad out their numbers.” Ham explained further. “They relied on excellent command, communication, and control to make it all work.”
“I noticed as the battle went on the bots seemed to fight better.” Max mentioned.
“Yep. Neural net. As Lard better streamlined their net they’ll take in more battlefield information and fight better the longer it lasts. And… since I’m guessing none of them have been wiped in a while they might have needed the time to shake out personality quirks.” Ham glared at Jaeger.
“Bite me.” Jaeger just shot back.
“I was wondering why so many of them are people shaped. I mean… it’s not like the human form is honestly the best design is it?” Max looked around the table. “Not that I’m hating on our bodies or anything. I mean for military bots.”
“Why bipedal humanoid forms you mean. With hands that operate guns instead of built in weapons?” Jaeger asked and Max nodded. “Economics. Since most systems had to be built for humans to use it just became easier to make humanoid bots that can also use them. I mean… there are specialized APCs, vetalls, and dropships for droids that are way more efficient but they can also use the regular models built for humans. It also makes it more difficult to differentiate in the field. A standard Void infantry soldier in armor and a frontline combat bot look remarkably similar. So it’s harder to know who to target if they all look the same. Most of them lack built in weapons for simplicity. Why build a gun into a bot when the small arms already being manufactured work fine?” Jaeger shrugged.
“Bertha has built in weapons though.” Max mentioned.
“Well… she’s a bit different. Most combat bots are just supposed to replace infantry. Similar profile, similar size, similar jobs. Bertha is a heavy assault bot so she’s made to take on fortified positions and even mechs. But she can’t move fast without support. She’s also a more intelligent unit. Tex, Pyro, Gargoyle, they can all talk and have more distinct personalities which pushes the boundaries of legality under the Shanghai accords. Most just chirp to reduce organic similarities and since they lack processing power for more sophisticated communication.” Jaeger continued.
“You’d also be surprised how much control fingers have over something say… sticking out of the wrist.” Ham cut in. “Even for a bot they’re more accurate holding a gun. Plus a well armored core makes for a solid platform that’s harder to take down most of the time and the limbs can get replaced more easily. Though it gets more complicated with the variety of bots that were employed. I mentioned specialization and while most battle bots were generalist platforms there were lots of other units. Assault bots like Bertha are made to counter mechs in urban environments. Bug bots are made for wilderness ambushes. Howie’s are just walking artillery. There’s anti-tank bots too. The list goes on.”
“Yeah I was also going to ask. The Draugr had both tanks and mechs?” Max looked a bit confused.
“Well that’s cause the scavs made the tanks. They probably lack the sophistication for mechs so… slap some armor on some construction equipment, add a cannon or something, and you’ve got a shitty tank. But mechs are designed for urban combat while tanks are for open country.” Ham shrugged. “I mean… really there’s fucking… dozens of main platforms which are then further specialized into a hundred variants. But they try to reuse as many parts, weapons, and ammos as possible to make logistics easier. These guys are really where simplified logistics gets thrown out the fucking window.” Ham pointed around the table.
“Yeah well that wasn’t a major concern at the start of the program now was it?” Jaeger shrugged. “And unfortunately we’re going to suffer for that now with our own vastly limited logistics capabilities. I was thinking maybe we could try to find some old steggies and give them... sleds or something to carry supplies maybe?”
“Steggies?” Max asked.
“We called them steggies. They looked a bit like stegosaur...uses… stegosauri?” Jaeger looked around questioningly as he had no idea what the plural would be. “Four legged, had solar panel fins, made for long range patrol and recon with some light combat potential. I mostly thought of them since they need almost no maintenance and they’re self sustaining on most worlds.”
“But we don’t have many of them. Maybe if I tried to ping the planet for a general recall… but people would notice.” Ham pointed out and Jaeger shrugged it off.
“Just an idea.” Jaeger replied and then looked out the main window once more at the stars in the night sky. He was quiet for a while as he looked among the stars.
“You got quiet sarge.” Tanya mentioned as they sat there for a bit watching him.
“Just… been thinking a lot.” He replied. “This morning I smashed a man’s skull in with a rock.”
“What? When?” Max gasped out.
“On the beach. One of the Hive soldiers had been hit and he was crying for his mother which was going to give away my position. I couldn’t find the asshole’s gun so… I just grabbed a rock and…” He shrugged. “I was just looking at the sky wondering about the stars. I have no idea which one Earth is. I’m not even sure if we can see the direction Earth would even be in from here. Or how far away it is. Like… is the light of Sol as it reaches Solavis old enough that men smashing each other’s heads with rocks would be a common occurence still?”
“Like… how many light years it would take for it to each here?” Tanya asked.
“Yeah. Like if I went back in time to whenever that light was first cast by sol into the galaxy at large would I be a caveman? A roman? A mongol? Would I fit right in with my skull bashing? How have we made it so fucking far and yet still… we’re the same? I told Raven about how the galaxy doesn’t really care. So we have to step up and care in its place. We have to get the keys for ourselves so that Marque doesn’t get them, but beyond that I… I want to actually do something good with it. We can’t afford to be passive. I can’t… My failure in planning for an attack got Merlin killed.” He shook his head slowly.
“It’s not your fault sarge.” Tanya started.
“The fuck it’s not. I knew Marque was setting up artillery in the city. Did I think the Hive would just sit back and take it? Why have I sat here doing dick all about improving the world for my kids to live in?” He waved a hand.
“Dad…” Max started.
“I don’t regret taking the time to raise you like I have.” Jaeger added. “But I should have been doing more. I never should have let us split up. We’ve lost so much time… And… you know I’m not sure any of us is good for anything besides killing… But we’re going to use that to make the Galaxy a better place.”
“Fuck yeah.” Brandy-Lynn grinned, obviously on board with his plan already.
“How?” Figs asked, a bit more focused on the possibilities.
“If… When we get all these keys we’ll have the everything we need. We’ll have our old intel and communications network back, not to mention a way to track down wisps and mimics. Then we start bribing, blackmailing, and backstabbing whoever we need to to get shit done. Brandy-Lynn you’re the fucking Golden Web boss of this planet! You’ve got access to a criminal network through all civilized space and beyond! We can use that!”
“You can count on me sarge!” She ginned, just as eagerly.
“Figs, we can use your legitimate connections to make inroads with politicians beyond just finding out more about the keys! And even your company can provide us cover if we need it.” He waved at Figs who nodded.
“Yeah, that would make sense. Start up some initiatives, get lobbyists in our pocket.” He agreed.
“Ham you said Tabori is an assassin for hire now right? Well once we track his ass down we can use that too! He’ll know not only who else we can hire in a pinch to take out people we don’t like but just by being a part of that world he might know who we should watch in general! And Ham you… uh…” Jaeger trailed off a moment.
“Yeah?” Ham asked, arching a brow.
“You love pirates!” Jaeger finally pointed out. “You know shipping and star lanes! So if we need to hit at ships in the void you’ll know how to make it look right! Or even out to avoid the pirates that are really out there!”
“Yaarr.” Ham let out a pirate growl as he grinned.
“Tanya, you’re fucked up. But you’re the sort of fucked up that actually takes the time to ponder the sort of shit none of us do.” Jaeger waved around the table. “We’ll need that if we’re going to make this work. Knowing precisely who to bribe and how, who to blackmail and how!”
“That’s not exactly the focus…” Tanya trailed off then and shrugged. “Fuck it. It’ll give me something to do.”
“Plus if need to honeypot any more Hive bishops you’re the girl for the job.” Brandy-Lynn wiggled her eyebrows.
“Who the fuck told you… Ham I’m going to strangle you!” Tanya growled out.
“I was just catching her up to speed earlier!” Ham held up his hands to ward off any attacks.
“I didn’t even know you swung that way. You always seemed way too boring and vanilla to be interested in more fucked up dramatic dangerous fucks.” Brandy-Lynn added.
“It wasn’t… you know what you wouldn’t know a meaningful and heartfelt connection with another person if it burst out of your ass!” Tanya hissed back at Brandy-Lynn who just cackled.
“I’m serious though.” Jaeger held up a hand to stop them from further bickering. “We do this to help drive the Pact in the right direction. Our issue was that we had no one watching us while we got up to shady shit. And now it might turn out that Titan is following in our footsteps. So we’ll watch them watching everyone else! We shift the tide of public opinion to make synths legal again. No matter how long it takes. No matter the cost.”
“Yeah!” Ham clapped at that and the others let out various agreements.
“But… what gives you the right?” The table went quiet as everyone looked at Max who gulped and leaned back a little then. “I mean… it wouldn’t be legal… what you guys are talking about. There’s no… due process…”
“Max we’re already bad guys. We’re already evil. We might as well be evil for the right reasons. This is a time of change and transition. If we steer this right we could make the Pact a truly great government. And we just tidy up the dark corners that the law can’t reach. We’ve done it before. But we did it at the behest of other people who we simply accepted knew what they were doing. And never feel like you shouldn’t call us out on this sort of thing. I want you to. That’s why I show you so many of your mom’s memories. She was better about all this than I was. But instead of just following orders now we’ll have to make the decisions for ourselves.”
“Hell, I always felt our extracurriculars were the best things we did.” Brandy-Lynn nodded.
“Your what?” Max asked with a frown.
“I kept reading about how girls visiting some of the other nations would talk about getting groped on trains, or pulled towards questionable places by the locals. So one time on leave I tried it out. I had the others keep watch from a distance and dressed the part of whimsical bratty tourist girl out of her element. Sure enough some guys got grabby… and I took care of them.” Her grin turned sinister at that.
“Dare I ask how?” Max asked although even then he looked hesitant to discover the answer.
“Ripped their balls off.” That same evil grin was plastered on her face.
“Off?” Max stressed in surprise only for Brandy-Lynn to raise her hands to make grabbing and yanking motion that made Max shudder.
“Command signed off on it too. They encourage our hobbies. I would hunt the more vile pirates.” Ham shrugged. “Tabori hunted poachers.”
“Drug dealers.” Figs nodded and then caught Max’s look. “Like illegal drugs dealers who spiked their shit or sold to kids.”
“Tanya went after loan sharks.” Jaeger mentioned.
“How dare you try and associate that scum with violence based artisanal locally sourced money lenders!” Brandy-Lynn shot back as she pointed at Jaeger. “Those were corporate shitstains that’s what they were.”
Max just looked questioningly at Tanya who shrugged. “I had some friends who had to deal with shady student loans. Schools that would tell them they were getting financial aid but really it was predatory loans. Stuff that pushed the limits of legality. Mostly the Void had strict consumer rights protections but… where money is made corporations proved willing to… muddy the waters of some of those laws with lobbyists. I figured… fuck it. Sometimes the law is wrong. Sometimes… there needed to be people who cut through it.”
“And that was the point of the Revenant program. Kill one so ten may live. Kill a hundred to save a thousand. Kill ten thousand to save a hundred thousand. Kill a million so a billion might survive. Do what has to be done. Do what others can’t. In the end… it didn’t work. But I maintain that it wasn’t the fault of how we got shit done but the people aiming us. That’s why I stress how important it is for you to think for yourself. Because I didn’t.” Jaeger shook his head.
“Dad-” Max started.
“I didn’t.” Jaeger cut in. “I just followed orders. I was some dumbfuck kid from the stacks who barely made it into the program and I was so thankful for that. So… fucking… thankful. I just assumed these people with college degrees, and… doctorates, and experience, and rank just knew more than I did. Yes sir. Kill this town? Yes sir. Shoot this family in the face? Yes sir. Do terrible things that qualify as war crimes? Yes sir.” Jaeger kept saluting as he said that.
“That girl… that Raven asked about… The one you said must have escaped?” Max looked worried.
“I killed her.” Jaeger didn’t bother hiding it.
“But she was… a kid right? Raven’s age?” Max’s expression nearly broke Jaeger’s heart.
“Orders. Condition zero. No witnesses. No survivors. No exceptions.” Jaeger shook his head slowly.
“See this is why we’re all still afraid of your dad.” Brandy-Lynn spoke up to take some of the focus off Jaeger.
“You guys? But you’re all… He’s just baseline…” Max looked a little confused as he looked around the table.
“As soon as someone gets put into his mental needs to die list he won’t hesitate. And the thing is only two people in the universe can’t be put on that list. You and Raven. Everyone else? Dead. No hesitation. Cops? Civilians?” She shook her head. “Sorry. Hell, if any of us were somehow put in a place that we became a threat to your life or Raven’s? Your dad would fucking kill us. In a heartbeat. Faster if possible. But that’s because he’s the most selfless fucking person I’ve ever met.” She looked back at Jaeger.
“That’s a lie and you know it. About my being selfless. I would certainly kill you without hesitation if I needed to.” He nodded.
“Love you too sarge.” She grinned and then focused on Max. “See, your dad accepts the responsibility of being the bad guy. Of being evil. He still does the right thing. He just doesn’t bother with all the bullshit. And don’t let him fool you with his hard talk. Sure we’re evil… but we killed a lot of bad guys that no one else could. Him killing a kid? It sucks. But in the face of stopping a war? Stopping the Apostles? Fuck it was worth it. We aren’t cops. We’re killers. Let the law catch who it can and we’ll get the rest.”
[Continued in Comments]

My son has reached the age at which he can enjoy my stories. By now, his friends have gathered that I am “the guy” who wrote those books and Creepypastas that they have read and listened to on YouTube. Sometimes, when they are over the house, we’ll sit out around a bonfire in the backyard and share stories. Each time we do, it never fails that someone asks “Yeah, but do you have any true stories?”
True? Are you insinuating that my stories aren’t true? Well, for the most part they are not. There are a few that are mostly true, or based on true events; but I recently remembered one that is entirely true, and it still gives me the shivers. Let me digress a bit and properly set the background.
There are three types of campers. The first are the “glampers,” who drive around in their two-hundred-thousand dollar motor homes with king sized beds, satellite TV and internet access, and more televisions than are in my entire house. Then are the “campers,” who rent lots at campgrounds or state parks and sleep on the ground in tents telling themselves that, unlike the glampers, they are really roughing it. And that leaves the stone agers. My friends and I fall in that last category.
Our idea of camping was to drive out to the wilderness, pull off the side of the road, stuff as much as we could into our backpacks, and take off on foot up into the mountains. Give me a sleeping bag, a gun, a bottle of cheap whiskey, and a can of beans and I’m set for the weekend. That is how my friends and I spent most of our summer weekends in our younger years.
Growing up in Cleveland, Ohio, the nearest place that we could find actual wilderness included a four hour drive to the foothills of the Appalachians in the Allegheny National forest. We would hit I- 90 right after work on Friday and drive east along the great lakes until we reached the outskirts of the forest, then plunge south into its heart. Our destination was the little town of Red House near the Seneca Nation Indian Reservation. It was a long, boring drive – especially after a hard day’s work – but our excitement would begin to grow when we spotted the first familiar landmark. Driving along the Allegheny River highway, it was impossible to miss the Kinzua Dam. Built for flood control and used to generate hydroelectric power, the one-hundred-eighty foot high concrete structure was massive and visible from miles away. It was, and still is, the largest dam east of the Mississippi River.
Passing the dam, we would go over a long bridge that crossed the man-made Allegheny Reservoir that had come to be known as Lake Perfidy – an interesting and fitting name, as you will soon find out. Red House was not far beyond that. On this particular occasion, our party consisted of myself and two friends: Mike and Rob. We reached an abandoned gas station – our “base camp” – shortly after nine o’clock. As usual, we packed our things and begin climbing into the Appalachian foothills. We were in a hurry to get to one of our favorite spots as soon as possible. It was freezing cold, even though it was the middle of August, and we still needed to locate some dry wood for a campfire.
Finding cut logs and kindling was never a problem, as that part of the forest underwent a constant process of selective logging. Trees were thinned out rather than clear-cut, allowing the logging companies to get their take while leaving a sustainable forest to repair itself. There was always some waste left over, and as soon as we dropped our packs and sleeping rolls, we went off hunting for chunks of wood. Another advantage of having the logging companies working out there was the network of primitive logging roads that they left behind. Narrow, flat, and paved with pressed sawdust and wood chips, the roads made great trails to follow. Theoretically, we could have used them to drive further up the mountain but a ranger had long ago warned us that they were dangerous. They twisted and turned without warning, were sometimes blocked by fallen trees, and if the weather was wet they tended to slide out from beneath your vehicle, potentially leaving you hanging from a mountain ledge. In addition to that, he told us stories about the local drunks who would use the roads at night to get from the bars in town out to their homes in order to avoid using surface roads, where they might run into the sheriff. Two vehicles trying to negotiate the same road, in opposite directions, with (at least) one drunk operator was a recipe for disaster.
Friday night was uneventful. We gathered some wood, got a fire started and laid out our sleeping rolls. We sat around the fire for an hour or so passing around a bottle of Echo Springs and talking about our plans for Saturday and then, exhausted, hit the hay.
Okay, the one downside of sleeping under the stars is the potential to wake up half-submerged in a puddle of water. Sure enough, it had rained overnight. Not enough of a downpour to wake any of us up, but enough to thoroughly soak our campsite. The coals from the previous evening’s fire were still sizzling. My sleeping bag, and my clothes, were soaked. First order of business was to get a roaring fire going and try to dry out and warm up. That done, we decided to head back to the truck and make a run for the reservation. Surely, we thought, there must be some type of general store where we could buy some tarps so that we would be prepared in case more rain should come on Saturday.
Although we had camped near the reservation for years, we had never actually been to the reservation. Driving in, we were all a bit anxious. We did not know what to expect. We had heard that the natives didn’t hold any fond feelings for “the white man.” I suppose that we half expected to find teepees and wigwams but instead found trailer parks and bingo halls. It was a thoroughly depressing place. Squalid living conditions and poverty oozed from every pore of the place. Maybe the white man really did screw these people over. They could always leave, though, right? Make their way out in the real world? I suppose it’s not that simple and I will never truly be able to understand. In our modern age, a reservation is just a place where a tribe has sovereignty to run their own government and enforce their own laws, even if contained entirely within another state. Hence, the bingo halls and casinos, which would be taxable or outlawed in the surrounding area. Of course, the prospect of gambling was not helping out the Seneca people. Big spenders did not often flock to little towns in the middle of nowhere.
We weren’t having much luck finding anything other than what I just described when we stumbled across an old man sitting out in front of one of the bingo halls. Tanned, high-cheeked, and sharp featured, the man was obviously an Indian – an Iroquois, actually. He was also clearly drunk. If we couldn’t tell by looking at him (which we could) then it was readily apparent by smelling him from ten feet away. Of course, we had heard the old clichés about lazy Indians living off the government’s teat while they spent their days lying around drinking. That isn’t really the case, though. In fact, this guy was just an alcoholic, plain and simple. He could just as easily have been a white, black, or Asian man sitting in the doorway of an abandoned building in downtown Cleveland.
Mike rolled down his window and called out to the man. “Hey dude! Is there a hardware store or something around here?”
The old Indian looked up and tried to focus on our truck. “Huh? What are you looking for?”
“A place we can buy some supplies. We’re looking for some canvas tarps – you know, to keep the rain off.”
“Oh,” the Indian nodded, “Campers, eh? If I were you I would count my blessings and just go home.”
“Not an option, man.”
“Let me think, then.”
We parked and got out of the truck. You could almost see the gears grinding away in the guy’s head. “Nope,” he finally said, “Can’t help you. But you should really leave. Full moon tonight.”
“We’re not the superstitious type, man.”
“Not superstition,” the Indian said shaking his head vigorously. “Fact. It is very dangerous for you to be here. Onekahokwe comes, if not tonight then tomorrow for sure.”
“Oh-ne what?”
“Onekahokwe.” He sounded it out as oh-NEEK-ah HOCK-way. “The water man.” It was obvious that he was itching to tell us the legend, and we had nothing else to do, so we sat down on the sidewalk next to him and he began speaking.
“In 1796, Pennsylvania gave Seneca Warchief Cornplanter fifteen-thousand acres of land in this valley as thanks for his support as protector of American families settling in the Allegheny River valley. In what would become the oldest treaty between the Indians and the whites, General George Washington granted the land to the Seneca tribe forever.
“The white man has a funny idea of forever, though. In 1965 they built the dam. It flooded the river valley, covering our ancestral land. Our homes, our farmland, the graves of our families. All of it, hundreds of feet below water. Our tribal leaders begged the government to stop the building of the dam, but in 1960 the president of the United States broke the longest standing treaty with Native Americans that ever existing. They claimed to have relocated our burial grounds further up the hillside but we do not believe them. Many of the graves remained, including that of Chief Cornplanter himself.
“The Seneca people still consider it a vile act of desecration. The whites simply referred to the man-made lake as the Allegheny Reservoir, but to the Seneca it has always been called Lake Perfidy – as a reminder of the treachery and deceit visited upon us by the U.S. government.”
Rob raised his eyebrows. “So where does aqua-man play into all of this?”
“Dude,” I interjected, “Have some respect. Can’t you see that he’s serious?”
The old Indian raised his hands, as if in surrender. “No, no. He is right to ask. That is the only way to understand.” He turned to face Rob. “The park rangers try to keep it secret, but divers inspecting the dam encountered a terrifying creature. It was ugly, fierce, and so threatening that they will only dive in cages now. We believe that was Onekahokwe. He protects our ancestors’ remains from being despoiled even more than they already have.”
“That’s just a rumor, though, right.” I didn’t know if Rob was making a statement or asking a question.
“No. It is the truth.”
I’ll admit that the hairs on the back of my neck were raised, but I still felt relieved. “Well, even if it was it won’t be a problem for us. We don’t plan on doing any swimming.”
“Does not matter.” The old Indian shook his head. “When there is a full moon, Onekahokwe walks on land. He comes for his sacrifice and to be worshipped. It would be best if you did not meet him.”
“Walks on land, eh?” Rob slapped his knees and stood up. “Well, I think we’re done here! Thanks for the story, man. I think we’ll take our chances, though.”
We all laughed nervously and then left the Indian to go back to the bottle that he had been hiding behind his back. We never did find any tarps, but (not surprisingly) the old man was able to direct us to a duty-free liquor store where we could replenish our supply of whiskey.
While we had no trouble believing the Indian’s story about how the government reneged on their land treaty, we drew the line at the story of the fish man. Our interest having been piqued, though, we took a ride up to the dam to see if the visitor center was open, figuring that we might be able to find some brochures or some other sources of information about Kinzua’s history. We lucked out and, despite the previous night’s rain, the gate to the causeway over the dam was open and we were able to walk out to the small blockhouse at the end of the spillway. There was a park ranger there and we started to shoot the shit with him, telling him about the old Indian and his story.
The officer assured us that the divers from the Army Corp of Engineers did not use cages and had never spotted any “fish creatures.” He said that they had run into some very large catfish and muskellunge. The muskie grew up to eight feet long had some pretty wicked teeth, but they stayed away from the divers and were not enough of a danger to warrant using a diving cage. He also told us that unfortunately, what the old Indian had said about the U.S. government screwing them over was entirely true, right down to the tidbit about there still being some graves that never got relocated. The ranger excused himself for a minute and returned holding a pair of binoculars. One by one, he directed our attention to areas where we could glimpse the remains of the town of Corydon breaking the water’s surface. A church steeple, the roofline of an old building and some brush – the latter which he said were the tops of trees. If you were to take a boat over to that area, you would be able to see the trees’ entire canopies below the surface. More evidence of prior human settlement appeared during periods of drought.
An entire submerged town, sort of like Atlantis. Creepy, but certainly nothing as hair-raising as fishmen.
Having spent the morning listening to the old legend about the valley that we had camped in numerous times before, we were happy to see that the overcast sky was clearing. Perhaps we didn’t need any tarps after all. We returned to camp and spent the afternoon and early evening hiking in the mountains, making a side trip to bring some more large logs back to camp, which we set around the fire to dry out so that we could use them later that night. After dinner, we washed up our kits in a small creek and set to drinking. Once thoroughly drunk, we pulled out our guns for some target practice. Alcohol and guns – a logical combination, right? Fortunately for us, there were never any problems.
After a while, we had settled down and were sitting around the fire waxing nostalgic about previous trips and making plans for future weekends, when we heard an engine revving up nearby. We were about one hundred yards into the woods off the nearest logging road, yet we could see headlights glimmering through the thick forest. Before we had time to realize what was going on, the headlights were speeding past us. The sound of the engine was louder and we could hear the vehicle’s tires skidding on the wet sawdust road. Within seconds, its taillights winked out as it turned a corner.
Eyes wide, Rob exclaimed “Must be one of the locals heading home from the bars.”
“Yeah but… Jesus! He was moving too fast even for dry roads.”
“I’m sure that he’s an old pro,” I said. “Anyway, no skin off our noses.” And so we went back to our business of drinking and bullshitting, growing tired and lying back on our (still squishy) sleeping bags. After what was probably half an hour, we heard the sound of twigs snapping nearby, as if something was walking toward us through the forest undergrowth. Adrenaline surging, we instantly snapped out of our stupor and sat up straight. Something was out there. Looking into the woods in the direction of the sounds, we could see a glowing pair of eyes. It had to be a bear!
There were plenty of black bears in the area, and we had run across more than a few in the time we spent in that forest. One bear in your camp is one bear too many. The bears in the area only ran between ninety and one-hundred fifty pounds, but I use the word “only” very loosely. They have those big, sharp, pointy teeth and claws, you know. The old myth is to hang your food up in a tree to keep the bears away. Well… Bears are very good climbers, and it just becomes a big bear-piñata, so that never really worked. We found that tightly sealed plastic bags work better – even for garbage. Nevertheless, the bears in the area are a bit too familiar with humans and get curious sometimes. Usually making a lot of noise was enough to scare them off, so we tried that this time but the bear answered back.
“Hey! Anybody out there?”
Wary of the late night visitor, Rob already had a hand on his gun. “Yeah. Who’s asking?”
A young guy, maybe early twenties, emerged from the woods. He must have noticed the gun because his hands were raised. “I don’t want any trouble guys. I saw your campfire when I passed by.”
Still on the defensive, Rob asked, “So what? Are you Smoky the Bear?”
“No, man. I was hoping that you could help me out.”
“With what?” As the guy stepped into the light from our campfire, we could see that he was pretty banged up – forehead and left arm bleeding – and that he was limping a little.
“I, uh...” he started sheepishly, “I had a little accident. I was going a bit too fast and flipped my truck up the way.”
“Oh, so that was you!” I said.
“Yeah. It’s slippery out tonight. So, do you guys think that you could help me flip it back on its tires? It’s kinda’ sideways right now. I could probably get it back straight up with some help.”
It sounded like the guy may have been through the same thing before – either himself or with a friend. We put our heads together and talked it over in low voices, then agreed. Rob and Mike would go with him and try to help him out. Being the paranoid city-folk that we were, we decided that I should hang back at the camp. There was always a slim chance that it was a setup. This guy draws us away, and his friends sneak in and take our stuff. It was an unlikely scenario, but we felt more comfortable that way.
Rob and Mike went off into the woods with the unfortunate driver, and I settled back down next to the fire. I laid back and started to relax. Knowing that I wouldn’t be able to fall asleep until they returned, I lay there and listened to the insects and frogs chirruping. It couldn’t have been more than ten minutes before I heard the snapping of twigs again – much too soon for my friends to be back, as I had calculated from the time it took the guy to get from his truck back to us. The thought of facing a bear on my own was a little daunting, but I had done it before. I stared deep into the woods and let my eyes adjust to the darkness.
Once again, it quickly became apparent that it was not a bear coming toward me. Not even a bunch of bears. I saw multiple sets of eyes reflecting the moonlight, and heard voices. The people were speaking in what I assumed to be the Iroquois tongue. There must have been about a dozen of them. In all of our years camping out in the woods in that valley, I had never seen any of the Indians out in the forest. Now, here was a whole band of them – and I was alone. My anxiety grew in proportion to the volume of their voices.
The Indians must have seen my campfire. They passed so close that they could not have possibly missed it, yet they continued on, passing me as if I were not even there, intent on getting to their destination. Curious – or perhaps just plain stupid – I decided to follow them and see where they were going. I don’t know if I was being as stealthy as my drink-addled brain thought or if they truly did not care that I was following. I got bold and closed the distance between them and myself. That’s when I noticed that two of the Indians were half-dragging, half-leading another man who appeared to be in a stupor. Seeing that concerned me, so I dropped back further into the woods.
They group arrived at a clearing at the top of a hill. I recognized it, as there was one very tall, dead, and completely stripped birch tree smack dab in the center. We had thought about cutting it down for firewood at one time, but it was just too darn big. The two Indians who were leading the impaired man approached the tree and lashed him to it with leather thongs. Then they all stepped back and began to chant. I must have gone on for a good half an hour but I remained there, transfixed by the sight and the sound of their invocation.
Then… I shit you not… this thing came out of the woods. I can only attempt to describe it because it was like nothing that I have ever seen. It was like nothing that should possibly have existed on earth.
The creature was undoubtedly Onekahokwe. The fish man. Although it was definitely part fish, I could not have attributed any features of “man” to it other than its un-fishlike appendages. Like a fish, the transition between its head and body was almost indistinguishable. The head/face portion was bulbous and spherical, probably three feet in diameter with a mouth that extended almost all of the way across it. It had two bulging, opaque eyes and a fin running down its spine – sort of like the dorsal fin on a marlin, only bigger. It was scaly, too, and it smelled funny. Not fishy, just… funny. Unlike a fish, though, this creature had long arms that hung from just below its head to the ground. It also had two stumpy legs. All of its limbs ended in flat, webbed, paddles that appeared to have a finger-like bone structure supporting them. Each “finger” or “toe” was tipped with a sharp barb. Based on the proportion of its height to the surrounding men, I would guess that it stood at least eight feet tall.
It was obvious that the Indians had expected the monster to appear, but they still seemed startled and afraid. They quickly scattered and fled into the woods, leaving behind the poor man that they had tied to the tree. He seemed to snap out of his trance at the sight of the fish man, and opened his mouth in a silent scream.
The last clear memory I have of Onekahokwe was when it looked directly at me. Our eyes met and it was as if it peered into my soul. I don’t think that it was at all concerned with my presence but I was not about to hang around to find out. I took off blindly into the woods, slamming my shoulders into trees in the darkness. I had the bruises to prove it the next morning, but at the time I did not care. From behind me came a combination of blood-curdling sounds. One was a human scream, letting me know that the man – a sacrifice, obviously – had found his voice. The other, much louder sound, was like nothing I had ever heard before. I had a feeling that if fish made sounds, it would sound very similar.
In my terror, I got lost in the dark and eventually had to work my way back to a logging road that I could follow back to our campsite. Apparently, I had beaten Rob and Mike back. They must have had quite a bit of trouble getting that guy’s truck set upright. At least I hoped that was why they hadn’t returned yet. I finished off the dregs of the bottle of Echo Springs and then dug into Rob’s backpack looking for more. I was happy to find that he had brought along a bottle of Jack Daniel’s – the good stuff – probably for an “end of summer” or “beginning of fall” celebration. We didn’t need many excuses for celebrations. I felt bad for opening it without the others there, but I needed another drink. That drink ended up being half the bottle.
I wondered what I would tell the guys. They would think that I was crazy or making the whole thing up. The decision had to wait until morning, though, as I had passed out before they returned. I was too hung over and befuddled to say anything the next morning, and I realized that the more time that passed, the more my credibility would suffer.
In the end, I never did end up telling Rob and Mike anything about what had happened. In fact, after a while I even began to doubt myself. Maybe it was all just a bad dream inspired by the old Indian’s story and fueled by the whiskey and too many baked beans. These days, I like to tell myself that it was. Nevertheless, that was my last trip to Kinzua.
Kenneth Kohl http://amazon.com/authokennethkohl

Literally just got home from the casino. Started the weekend with about $2,500 in my account now its down to $2.52.
I'm 26 years old and have been gambling pretty regularly since I turned 18. It was scratch off tickets before I turned 21 and then casinos after 21. I am college educated and have a pretty decent job making more than $20/Hour.
I have known that I am a compulsive gambler for quite some time. I've never denied that fact. I work about 2 minutes from a major casino and would go there almost every morning after I got off work. After a $600 loss one morning, I worked up the courage to go ask them to put me on the voluntary exclusion list. This was very hard for me, for I was choking back tears. What a horrible feeling that is. That was about a year ago and now I am not allowed into any casino in the state. What a relief right! Wrong.
Not long after I did that, I found myself traveling across state lines to the casino about 45 minutes away. Not a bad drive, but still forced to go there. I continued my losses there for a while until I went to a teller and asked for a cash advance on my credit card. It was then that I guess I was flagged in the system for being a problem gambler in the next state. Turns out, this casino worked with other casinos in my state so I wasn't allowed to be there either. They had to call security to escort me out (which was painfully embarrassing). Thankfully, they let me off with a warning and didn't arrest me for trespassing.
So now I didn't have access to any casinos that were near by. You better believe I got online and looked up nearest casinos, but the closest one, out of state, was about 5 hours away. I never made that trip. But in my research, I found out that I could still go to Indian casinos and not get in trouble. Yay, there is one about half an hour away!
This casino is terrible. There are no table games what so ever. The only thing in the casino are slot machines. The type of people that go there are not the most upstanding type of people either. I'm not one to judge, but the majority of people look to be down and out and on drugs. It wasn't until recently that I started to think to myself, "am I becoming one of these people?" I don't do drugs, but I am still there, glued to a machine spinning my paycheck away.
There were weekends where I would do really well. I would get home after a few trips over the weekend and have 2-3 grand in my wallet. I would feel on top of the world. Put it in my safe and tell myself that I can finally stop gambling, I'm back ahead and can start saving. Of course, that doesn't last and every last penny of that goes back into the machines the very next weekend.
I feel like I have hit my rock bottom today with gambling. I have pawned many items of value that I used love (though I always buy them back with interest of course.) My credit card is always just under the max limit and it is affecting my credit score now. I often go through the week not knowing how I will pay for gas or food because I put myself in these bad spots financially. I think the biggest thing this week is I had to call my parents to help me pay for a dental procedure. It costed $300 and I told them I was going to pay them back this weekend. I don't have any more money and now I'm going to attempt to dodge them until I get paid next week. That's really low for me. Damnit.
I can't even say that I have, legitimately, tried to stop gambling. I never last more than a week. I can't remember the last time I didn't gamble in some way, shape, or form for over a week. I've done the math.. with the amount of money I bring in every week, and what I pay for rent/bills/food/etc.. I could have everything paid off for the month in 1 week. The rest of my income could be saved or put towards something meaningful. I know this, yet I still cannot stop gambling. Once it gets into my head I can't say no. All those shitty drives home broke and feeling sorry for yourself don't register after a few days.
This needs to fucking stop. This cycle. Sorry for the profanity I am very mad at myself currently.
Thank you for anyone that reads this or replies. Any feedback or advice is definitely welcome.
Today is my day 1. My true test will be next weekend when I get paid. Can I tell myself NO? Can I find something else to occupy my mind? I will surely try.

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Date: 2012-11-09
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Questions	Answers
What is the craziest/funniest story you have about your students?	Wow lots to answer! I'll start with... 2.you really need to be aware of cultural and religious differences in the classroom. It is sometimes really difficult when you realize something you assume is "general knowledge" is way outside their experience - teaching myths and legends for example: they know the story of the rainbow serpent and aboriginal dreaming, or how the gods gave fire to the Tongan man, but they might have no clue who the three little pigs are. Oh the other hand, because we have a 40% pacific islander population, they are really free and open with creativity, music and dance in particular. The most popular performance in the entire year has been the Cook Island girls doing traditional dance!
Do you take into account the multiculturalism of your class when designing your lesson plan?	I decided to go into teaching for several reasons - firstly because I believe kids need someone who is passionate and wanted to help them to succeed. It didn't hurt that my mum teaches too, so I knew what I was getting into! I also was lucky and got a scholarship to cover my entire university costs if I agreed to work in a "difficulty staffing area" for 3 years minimum. I was a "targeted graduate".
How does such a diverse student population affect the learning climate?	Honestly, though, I really feel that there is no such thing as a "bad" kid. Crazy, yes, but not evil. Even the worst one has some good in them. I did work experience in juvenile justice system and thought that most of these kids come from such horrific experiences, how could they get out of the pattern without people working to preventing them falling further down the same path?
What made you decide to get into teaching?	As for crazy, do you mean funny, weird, confrontational, violent, insane...? Because I have a few, both from personal experience and stories from others...
That's awesome! Sounds like a very exciting place to live.	I really love it. We have Tongan, Cook Islander, Samoan, P&G, phillipines, Turkish, afghanis, Sudanese, Indian, Fijian, Italian, Anglo, aboriginal, Chinese, among others, but there is ever any racial divides!
Have you ever seen the movie Fortress? Don't they have a song about the piggies?	Never seen it, sorry!
Are there any Jonah Takaluas?	I don't think so. Ive never heard of Jonah Takaluas.
How about one weird, one funny, and one violent?	Alright!
	Weird: I had a boy aged about 14 who had mental health problems. He barricaded himself into the middle of the classroom during class using chairs and stayed in there for an hour, pretending to be a cat. He also refused to take the DET funded laptop because the government could track his thoughts.
	Funny- an aboriginal girl in yr 7, let's call her Teraha (not her name, hers is weirder) stole a whole bundle of white foundation makeup from drama and smeared it all over herself. Went around screeching "Look Miss! Now I'm a white fella like you!" at every class. She kept going until a boy started calling her Michael Jackson and she punched him in the face. I thought it was clever, she got a long suspension...
Where abouts? How do you manage to manage a class of 500?	The whole school population is roughly 500, with a teaching staff of 53. The largest individual class I teach is 29 students, but I am also a year adviser for yr 8, which is 84 students aged about 12 to 13 years old.
Oh ok, whereabouts is your school?	We are a small area so I won't give you the exact name or region, but it is roughly 8 hours inland from sydney, and is rural, not urban development.
Is it Parkes...I bet it's Parkes.	I only know two things about parkes: it's where the dish is and that the poet Peter skryznecki lived there in a migrant hostel as a kid. Not parkes.
Dubbo.	Not dubbo. Oh thank god, it is not dubbo.
Having just finished my HSC and the Advanced English course, I was really hoping I'd never have to see, hear or read Skrzynecki (pronounced Sheh-Nes-key just to stuff with us) ever again. Not that his work is inherently bad or anything, just that I'm so very, very tired of HSC English.	I know him personally. A nice man, but very forward!
I lived in Australia for a year (I'm from Canada) and found the racism to be overt compared to Canada (we are still racist but keep it mostly hidden). Is that your experience? Also can you post some scenery photos - I miss there.	I think the overt racism is cultural, we are a blunt people! I'd love to post some, but I'm using an iPad without any home pics. Anyone else got some?
Do you receive any extra pay compare to teachers in cities like Sydney? How is a teacher's salary set in Australia? Is it payed by the federal government, regional authority or the municipality?	In some areas, you get paid extra or receive subsides for housing etc. unfortunately, where I am does not qualify for these! It is too bad, a friend of mine in the far west pays less than $50 rent on her house and gets an extra week off because of the temperature and geographic isolation... As for who pays me, I am in public education system, so am technically a governmental employee! I am employed by the NSW (State) Department of Education and Community Services. If I was private sector, it would be a different story. Wages are decent, and they increase over time. I started as a 4 year trained graduate (I have 2 bachelor degrees, not a BA and a diploma) and the starting salary was about $54,000. Currently, I'm sitting on about $64,000 annually.
	This is the pay agreement if you'd like to look, but it is currently being renegotiated with the union. Link to www.det.nsw.edu.au
How do you feel about the divide on "my child is bad, therefore - I must parent" vs. "my child is bad, therefore - it is the teachers fault that my child misbehaves, as it's not my job to teach them morals, values and ethics" ?	I straddle the line. Yes, I as a teacher must teach and model appropriate behaviour and ethics, but we cannot do it alone. We see them 6 hours out of 24. What they get outside of school makes a far longer lasting impression and while I do my best to show your child what they should be doing, home is far more effective as they model from what is shown to them as appropriate!
In the case of the drop-outs and gang members: Do you think that these kids truly wanted to learn? As in, did they really want to succeed, but just gave in to gang pressures or lack of academic success?	It comes back to the difference between a learning difficulty and a learning impairment. Many kids honestly want to learn and please you, but are so anxious -as in psychologically/clinically phobic - that they will do anything, including acting out violently, to escape the situation. I have had kids in tears because they are so scared of reading a sentence they are literally crippled by it.
My girlfriend and I are moving over to Australia from Scotland in a little over a month, and she is a Home Economics teacher and will be looking for a job in that field before long. Do smaller, regional schools offer such programs? What would you say the main difficulties associated with regional living are?	A good question. Yes, we teach Food Technology, Textiles, Design &Technology... Basically, if it comes under the TAS description, it gets taught. See, the junior school (aged 11-16) in the public system get taught a basic taster course of most subjects and then elect their subjects in their final senior years. Your best bet is to sign up with the Department of Education and get a casual teaching number so she can get a feel for our system before applying for a temporary block or a permanent position.
	Main difficulties? Distance and isolation are the big ones. You are a long way from anywhere and it takes ages to get places. This means that access to opportunities and resources are limited to what is available locally. There is sometimes a very insular community who have trouble going outside of their town- I teach 18 year olds who have never been more than a two hour drive from home, never been on a plane or been to a capital city, who have no desire to ever do so.
Because Canberra is so nice?	Canberra is lovely, but so artificial!
30 different nationalities. Why? What is in your town/city? Casino? Mines?	We have a large itinerant population, lots of unskilled labour positions. This includes fruit and farming mainly. Also lots of refugees flooded into the areas for a better life, more opportunities in regional areas than in the cities.
Dingos ever eat any of your kids? Just kidding, but what creepy or dangerous insects or snakes do you have to be aware of by your school?	Do termites count? Joking. No, we have redback, whitetail and funnelweb spiders on premises, personally, I'd take the redback over whitetails, ( a whitetail is tiny and it's bite causes necrosis) brown snakes, tiger snakes, red bellied black snakes... Worst thing is when someone finds a baby brown snake. They're small, fast and venomous, but brown snakes never lay just one egg, so even if you catch it there is probably 4-8 other little brown evil snakes hiding under the building somewhere...
Yikes. Beautiful country..lots of nasty things.	Yeah, but they are usually more scared of you or are highly visible if you know what to look for. Whitetails are awful because they love to get into bedrooms and bedding in your sleep. If you miss the bite, it can be pretty nasty, google whitetail spider bite if you need some more reasons to avoid Australia!
How do the less privileged children that you teach deal with being upside down?	Well, from our perspective, it would seem that you must struggle with being upside down. For us, upside down is rightside up!
Ah. So they deal with it quite well then. Thank you for answering my question.	It was either that or invest in magnetized boots. And you are welcome.
an awesome gravity machine. but low socio-economic areas can not generally afford such machines.	Sadly true. We rely on thumbtacks and staples mostly, and tie ourselves down with double sided tape if we are feeling extravagant!
Please tell me you staple the children's bodies and not the clothes. Clothes tend to get expensive. Question B! How do you deal fight of dingos trying to steal the children, as well as the 9000 other creatures there trying to kill them?	Easy, packs of dingoes are easily warded off when you release the crocodiles with mouths full of deadly snakes.
Man, I does this make me want to visit your great land.	Hey, ask nice and I might even regale you with tales of childhood horrors! In the meantime, www.youtube.com/watch?v=eNEeq5qGh8I if you're still keen on Australia after that, look me up!
What's the attendance rate on an average day like?	Well, that depends. We have a lot of "partial attendance" where students truant a lesson or two, go down the street or hang out in the school grounds, but are technically at school. The majority of our kids have decent attendance, but the 15-16 year olds are bucking the curve- every class except year 10, I might be missing one or two, but today, my year 10 class of potentially 20+ students was actually a class of 7. (It was period one, some turned up later in the day). But every school has some problems. It becomes a major concern if a student's attendance rate drips below 85%. As a year advisor, I have to contact home and enquire about this before it gets sent on to the welfare team, but when you get someone who has been in school for roughly one week in ten altogether, then it gets passed on to the department of community services and the home-school liaison officer steps up.
Are you also sick of your students not tying up their kangaroos after arriving at school? I for one am sick of finding kangaroo shit in my staff room.	Yeah, it was really frustrating, but now we keep them on the back oval until the kids have to ride them home again. Once they fight off the swarms of deadly snakes and have a friendly boxing match or two, the Roos usually settle pretty quiet until we send off our boomerangs to get the latest beer advertising. that stirs them up like a bucket of prawns on a hot day!
As a rural school do you feel your students are disadvantaged in anyway in regards to funding, resources, teachers etc? I go to a school near Penrith which is not anywhere close to rural but I felt that my school either had terrible funds management or was less well off as schools closer to the city. Also if you don't mind me asking, whats the average ATAR score of your school?	This is hard to answer because my school is currently receiving special grants from the government to boost our funding. At the moment, we have two more teaching positions and an extra deputy that our number of students wouldn't usually support. When this runs out at the end of the year, we will be having some serious restructuring, losing a deputy, several members of the support/office staff (including groundskeeper) and between 2-4 teaching staff. This means the load for teachers will go up and our classes will increase in size. A big problem for us is our parents and families, being low-socioeconomic groups, cannot often afford uniforms, shoes, workbooks or other equipment, or school fees. We as a school subsidize a lot for our kids, and I personally keep a supply of books and equipment in my classroom that comes out of my own money. Many students arrive in inappropriate clothing, without a bag, food, solid shoes, books or a pen, and we have to do what we can for them. We are better off than some, but compared to those "best" Sydney schools? Not a competition.
This is hard to answer because my school is currently receiving special grants from the government to boost our funding. At the moment, we have two more teaching positions and an extra deputy that our number of students wouldn't usually support. When this runs out at the end of the year, we will be having some serious restructuring, losing a deputy, several members of the support/office staff (including groundskeeper) and between 2-4 teaching staff. This means the load for teachers will go up and our classes will increase in size. A big problem for us is our parents and families, being low-socioeconomic groups, cannot often afford uniforms, shoes, workbooks or other equipment, or school fees. We as a school subsidize a lot for our kids, and I personally keep a supply of books and equipment in my classroom that comes out of my own money. Many students arrive in inappropriate clothing, without a bag, food, solid shoes, books or a pen, and we have to do what we can for them. We are better off than some, but compared to those "best" Sydney schools? Not a competition.	As for our results, I honestly cannot remember the average ATAR from last year. I do know that in the NAPLAN testing, we are below state averages in literacy and comprehension, but we do more "value adding" than state average - meaning our students make more significant improvement in their result between yr 7 and yr 9 than is the state average, but they are starting at a lower point so are still not meeting the goal.
Wow thanks for the replies :) Honestly from how I perceive it, teaching deserves much more appreciation than it gets at the moment. I'm really glad your students got such a fantastic teacher like you and speaking from experience, is very hard to come by. Also, HSC english is poopy.	Ooooh yeah. HSC is the delight of everyone. I say this as an English teacher, HSC English, in my humble opinion, should not be mandatory. Scaled up to reward people who take it, yes. Like the maths syllabus. But mandatory, for everyone? It just makes you hate us and it.
FINALLY A TEACHER WHO (openly) AGREES! Compulsory HSC English left me so bitter and jaded after what would otherwise have been a very enjoyable final year of high school. Three years later and I can still feel the hatred welling up inside as I read those words.	It sounds like your teacher did not do the course justice. Mild disdain is expected, but welling hatred is ... Not a good sign.
One of my closest friend's parents are both rural school principals in NSW, one Primary over ~40 students, one highschool over a larger school. Out of interest, did you choose to work in the bush, or were you posted during teacher training? What was the biggest "culture-shock" moment for you when you started working out past woop-woop? Did you train in one of the capitals?	I chose to be rural because I felt I could do more good here. But not a culture shock. I grew up in a tiny, semi-arid, "rural-and-isolated" dairy farming town in the riverina and went to a rural university, (wagga), which meant I had more trouble adjusting to seeing hills than to the lifestyle!
I can see how that would be awesome! But by God, you're amazing for dealing with all that stuff, every single day. Amazing. I was a teacher too, so I know you don't get told that enough. ANd here's the government, come to yank your funding. And how about some more paper work for the Institute? Does it get lonely out there? I've been West, but only on business.	It does get lonely, particularly as I'm not married. Meeting new people out here is hard, especially once you weed out the ex students!
That's gotta be tough. I know convincing a fella who 1. will move out there and 2. understands your passion is a tall order, because I went through something similar while living not too far from the city. Is the job good enough to keep you there long term?	I have trouble because most people don't like to try long distance relationships. My job is a permanent position which is important. This means that I can be guaranteed a job from now until I retire, even if my school numbers drop and they don't need me, the government is obliged to find me another position in the state. This is called a "forced transfer" because I am technically a government employee, not employed by my specific school.
Do your students experience racism because they live in a mostly white country?	It is not as big a problem here as it is in some places where I have taught. Because we are very culturally dirvese, students are fairly tolerant of each other. They are more likely to be offensive to people of the same racial background than others! We do get some racism out in the community -one man I know refers to it as "the black school" and we have had visiting schools afraid to enter our school because of fears that they might get "bashed" by the aboriginal or islander students. When they do come in, they are usually pleasantly surprised that we don't react to newcomers with violence!
I taught out your way not all that long ago. I know you didn't say where but we both know there aren't many schools that far out with 500+ students! Nonetheless, our schools could still have been hundreds of kms apart anyway. It's a ridiculously big state. I just wanted to send this your way... Hands down, the best kids I ever taught came from that little town out west. I still keep in contact with many of them. They astound me with their growing lives and I genuinely miss them. It was tough out there, I saw things that Australians should be devastated by - kids living in 'buildings' that didn't have doors (you lift one of the walls out), sleeping in caravans with torn off roofing, travelling for an hour along dirt roads just to get to school - and yet those same kids rarely bitched and moaned like their city counterparts. I also received my best training out west - training which made me the teacher I am today. I'd like to think I'm the teacher reddit wishes it had! Or at least the one I wished I had! Enjoy your time out there - the good and the bad! How far away is the nearest movie theatre? It was 4ish hours for me.	I am lucky that way, we are only a couple of hours from a regional hub, with a cinema no less! I can get to see a movie in a little under an hour drive there and another back. It is hard, I think, for people who don't live out this way to truly understand what the distance is like. How many people out there can drive for several hours without seeing any sign of human society other than the road or occasional power lines?
Fellow registered teacher here. I've never taught in Australia though aside from my teacher training. What's the best way to go about getting your foot in the door into teaching? Is it generally accepted that you need to go out west and teach in a country school? Is it possible to get into some schools in the major cities in more permanent positions?	The staffing system is changing, but if you want to build experience, then going west helps. You can also work casually in a school and hope a position you are suited to opens up. Permanency is a major goal and it can take years of working temporary blocks of 6 months or a year to find a school wwhich can offer it. It's about being visible and writing applications well.
What do you think life would be like in that community, for a gay student?	It is difficult. Very difficult. admittedly, it is easier on the few we have here than other places I have been, we even have a few transgender students who are fairly accepted and moderately popular. Some of this is the acceptance in some pacific islander cultures, such as Tongan. From my school, the policy seems to be if you don't broadcast, they will not judge.
It has been about 2 years since I finished my teacher training. I've been teaching English In Japan since then. I don't think that experience is going to help me too much when it comes to looking for a job when I get home. Is there one particular skill or thing in demand outside teaching experience that I could develop to help me get a job?	Schools like people who bring more than their job description - if you have any specialities that could help, for example, I run a lot of extra curriculars for our school including the public speaking competitions. Think about what skills or willingness you have and how these could help the community.
With limited funds, do you believe you are still able to teach the fundamentals well enough to be considered successful?	I believe we do a pretty damn good job. All evidence we collect with statewide and national testing shows we are value adding to educational standard at above average for the lower ability students and we consistently get some of the best results for seniors in the region. We struggle to extend the mid range ability students as much as other schools may, but this is a situation where good teaching practise is more important than anything else we have to work with.
I am also studying teaching (high school - English and history major) and am also Australian. I was wondering, how is it teaching in a rural area? I have some friends who found the adaption hard due to suburban life.	Adjusting to rural life can be hard, I have friends who grew up in cities who find it grating, too quiet, dull and too far away from friends and family. But they tend to appreciate things I forget, like being able to walk out late at night and see the entire sky filled with stars and complete silence.
When I visited my friend 6 hours south from Sydney, the night sky was the beauty of it all... I still have a year to go thankfully, so when the time comes, ill hopefully be able to decide. Also is the pay better for rural? I've heard it is.	You get the same pay no matter where you are. But the further west you go, the better you concessions are. They need teachers and are happ to make offers to get them!
Are the Polynesian boys really the best break dancers in the whole suburb? PS - "Awww, Miss, you farted!"	Mainly the Polynesian, but the aboriginal and aboriginal/islander boys are pretty darn talented too!
How does your access to resources compare to that of a rural school in a place like, say Southwestern Virginia?	I have no idea, the only place I have been outside of Australia is China, which is very very different to australia educationally! We have access to the net, obviously, we have a decent amount of tech such as computers and smartboards in school rooms, and thanks to the dept of education, all students in years 9-12 have a school mini laptop. But we are a big, empty country, meaning it takes hours to get anywhere. Teachers struggle to get approval for professional development because it takes at least a 3 days worth of casual coverage - a days travel up, a day at the course and a days travel back...we just can not afford that.
Ay miss, is Jonah truly the sickest break dancer in school or are there new breakers out there we need to know about?	My boys are amazing. They have real talent. You watch out!
What do you listen to when you want to " jam the fuck out"? Genre, artists?	I love my old school classics, rolling stones especially, but i also have Pink, Marlyin Manson, Ramstien, Elvis, jazz, broadway musicals and 90s pop in the mix. When working with kids, teenybopper stuff tends to bleed into your consciousness. I unfortunately am now fluent in teenage girl and can discuss One Direction or the like almost painlessly!
I'm gonna say Griffith or Riverina area? Sounds like it.	Not Griffith. Further west.
Yes hi madam international drainage commission here; which way does the water in your toilet run?	If you want me to go check my neighbours, you could end up with an insanely high phone bill that causes an international incident.
How often you get called 'fucking white cunt'? A good friend of mine is a teacher and needs it to start her day, as well as strong black coffee.	I think that the best one I've ever been called is a "fucking white racist pig" by a parent. I don't think she saw any irony in calling me that.
Any moments where your work felt really fulfilling?	I remember being in my first year out teaching, working with a really low ability group, studying a poetry unit. We were 3 weeks in and they were really struggling with it. One day, I was working with a girl and you could see it just click - it was as if a switch had literally been flipped in her head and she looked at me with absolute wonder in her eyes - she said "Miss! There's so much more to poetry than just words, isn't there?! "
	They are rare but worth it!
Do dingos eat babies?	Actually, yes. Dingoes are untrustworthy feral animals, and have been known to maul small children or attack tourists. As for the Azaria Chamberlain story, I think the baby died, but I still don't know how the "dingo" got into a tent without causing any damage or disturbance...
Does "rise up lights" still sound like "razor blades" when an Australian says it?	No. Rys up lihts, versus rayzuh blahdez.
What is the gifted/talented programming like at your school (if any)? I know that multicultural schools, particularly rural ones have a very hard time developing and implementing programs for the gifted, but Australia has broken a lot of ground with that research. You said somewhere that PD is hard to come by, since you're so far away from everything, but are there resources available at your school (like a gifted resource teacher)?	We run gifted and talented programs in art and music, we also have dance students participate in school spectacular, but video conference training sessions. Our drama students just finished a joint drama production with our sister school in the western suburbs, where they used video chat, fb and internet to bond and build an entirely original play based on joint experiences as Australian youth.We also run a Targeted Sports program to identify those talented at athletics and sport, who get extra training and experience. It is working really well with the junior boys.
What does your AEO do? The official description appears to have been written by a committee, can you please explain using more concrete examples?	An AEO is employed at schools that have a significant number of indigenous students.Basically, they work in the school to get indigenous student the best possible educational opportunities and work within the indigenous community to promote the school and education.our AEO works with individuals who are recognised "at risk", helps create multicultural programs and resources, liaises with community members and aboriginal elders, and generally seeks out opportunities for our indigenous youth while being a visible, successful role model for the students.
Do you have Bogans? I keep seeing videos with them. They seem to be a combo of rednecks and pikers...	Trust me, everywhere has bogans. They are often racist, slow thinkers and lovers of real "ocker" cultural touchstones, such as utes with thousands of aerials, spotlights and a roo bar, B&S balls and bundy rum.
Do you actually work with Torres Strait Islanders?	Some yes, but the majority of indigenous students here are aboriginal.
I can't help but think of tommorrow when the war began. Have you ever read it to any students? Do any of your students resemble any of the characters?	I teach that book to my kids, in year 9. they love it, but don't really resemble the characters. Twtwb is a very blue mountains, mainly white population, farming town setting. Some of the landscape rings true but the people are not much like mine!
I don't know if you're still answering, but I'll ask. I live in a low socio-economic urban area in WA, where we have MAJOR problems with Aboriginal children being actively discouraged from attempting to study and improve their lot in life by parents who would rather they live off benefits. Many either feel that they are owed by the white man, or that there is no chance so why bother.. generally a mix of the two. Is this a problem in rural areas?	We don't have students being actively discouraged, but our parents often don't place much value on education, and often our kids have to work to help support the family. When you are working for 6-8 hours and not getting much sleep, school is not that important.
Are sports teams a big part of your school? Does it have a rugby/aussie rules team?	Sport is life in our school. If there is a competition out there, we have a team - we even have lawn bowls team!
Is the area anything like the movie "The Snowtown Murders"?	No, that was mountains and in a different state, I think.
Have you seen Wake in Fright?	Why do people keep asking me that?

Last updated: 2012-11-14 03:06 UTC
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